Friday, February 1, 2008

Gone Country-Country Cooking and Fuel

I guess everyone partied too hard especially Bobby Brown, because the next day he is unable to rise from his bed and is in a drunken stupor. Maureen tries to rouse him like the old married couple they appear to play. In the next room, they all (except Bobby) find guitars that has smash me written on them. Gee I always wanted to smash a guitar, doesn't it look like great fun? But it appears to be much harder than it looks for the women, smashing on brick walls doesn't make one dent when finally Dee puts his foot through them-he should know, he's a rocker. Whose ever guitar holds the note, will be the leader of the challenge. And much to Carney's surprise, she's the winner. The note says that the cast will be cooking a down home country dinner for his family, or as he called it his muzikmafia family, with grandma Rich as the judge, and who better to win this challenge, than Carney, she's all about the food. They all (except Bobby) make the caravan to the grocery store, Carney in the lead, making list, delegating tasks. Dee notices that Julio's shopping cart is only filled with yellow food-or as Julio says yjello food. Who knew? Maureen meanwhile is having a blast having her pictures snapped, which she says it's an every day occurrence. How nice!
Back at the farm, Bobby is finally rising, must be around 2 or 3 in the afternoon, and everyone is madly cooking. Bobby apologies which is endearing for about 2 seconds, now we know why Whitney threw him out, he spends the night boozing and partying so that the next day he's good for nothing, of which DeGarmo states she has no patience with someone in a drunken stupor. Watch out guys, if you marry her, you'll definitely have to tow the line! Julio now has the sleepies, must be all that yjello food, and takes a nap on the couch while everyone is furiously cooking-his punishment for napping, Julio has to set the table for all the guest, but Mother Maureen goes in to help him. She really is like someone's grandmother.
With dinner all set, JR's family begins to arrive, at first I thought maybe the carnival broke down outside, all shapes and sizes were coming through the front door. Wilson has a sudden shock of panic as she sees all the people and laments that they haven't made enough food! At the end of the meal, JR asks granny "Was it good?" You could feel the air being sucked out of the room, but then she pronounces "It's Good!" To which JR says that girl Carney can cook!-of course she can, she loves food!
After dinner and I'm sure they were all pooped-they all headed downtown to a club called Fuel, where JR had arranged that each cast member would sing their song on stage with his band. Maureen was petrified! She had a look of sheer horror! Each one took the stage, and of course, Bobby Brown and Dee fought for center stage, jealousy rearing it's ugly head. Mo was crying. DeGarmo blew them away with her amazing voice and she knew it. Mo was crying. Carney Wilson was a bit timid and scared but managed to pull it off, I'm thinking she just alittle self conscious of her weight. Mo was crying. Julio and JR did the duet "Of All the Girls I Used to Know" which sounded amazingly good, and of course it would since his father, Julio Igelesis did it previously with Willy Nelson, sounds of deja vu. Did I say, Mo was crying? In the end, she was terribly disappointed with herself for not having the courage to go on stage and sing, intimidated by the others and her lack of real live stage singing experience. Come on Mo, you knew what you signed up for, if you can't stand the heat, you better get out of the kitchen, or in this case the club!-Single D

Celebrity Apprentice-The Godfather Saga

Oh where to begin, this episode unfolds like a Mario Puzo novel, the mafia Don, Donald Trump, the rat Luca Brazi, Vinny, and the hotheaded Sonny Corleone, Piers Morgan. Oh I can hear that godfather music in the background. Meanwhile, back to the firing of Jennie, we learn in the war room, Omarosa wants that "twit Carol Alt gone"-frankly I think she just threaten by her statueque beauty. It's funny how not two seconds after that sentence leaves Omarosa's lips when Carol walks in and Omarosa gives her a congratulatory hug, women will be women!
This episode's challenge was to design a free standing Croc donation bin where people can donate their used crocs to be recycled for those in Africa. I never really cared for Crocs myself-relegating them to garden shoes, but now I give them a thumbs up for that concept.
Piers becomes the PM for the guys, and The Don choses Carol as the girls PM. Immediately Trace comes up with the perfect catch phrase of "Wear Them, Share Them", watch out for those strong silent types! And hence the mayhem begins. When the guys think the girls are spying on them, Piers sends in Vinny to be a spy and cross the line over to the girls camp. Women being the nurturers, takes in Vinny with open arms-What? Didn't they suspect anything? I kept thinking this has got to backfire, although while it was happening, it was so totally funny. Vinny was thinking he was still on the Sopranos. When Vinny wrote a note and threw it to Baldwin, I was surprised that Baldwin didn't purposely pick it up but called Lennox to pick it up. Baldwin wanted to disassociate himself from all this deceitfulness, because much to my surprise, surprise, he's a minister and a born again Christian. He was having a pang of consciousness!
I thought the bin shaped like a giant Croc was a light bulb moment for the women with the cut out sign of Carol perfect and even Omarosa had to admit that Carol is a 10, although we know how highly O thinks of herself by rating her sassy self a 9 1/2.
Meanwhile, Vinny, being the nice guy that he is, started to feel the warm and fuzzy for the girls and decided to do a double cross and become a double agent and start working for the girls team, which set off a series of events that eventually led Vinny to become as he said, a man without a country, scorned by the girls and rebuked by the guys. I did feel sorry for him, but he shouldn't have taken it so far, he shoulda called it quits when Marilu and him were to go to the factory. That would have been the perfect time to go back to the guys camp, but our Luca Brazi continued to play his role.
I thought the guys did well on their project with that great catch phrase and the croc drop sign, and it did look like the Croc reps liked the guys better (I ended up liking the guys drop better with the graphics and all), however, the girls won for once-I'm thinking that shoe would look better in the Smithsonian.
In the boardroom, Vinny was still in Godfather mode, saying how the rat always gets killed, to which Piers or Pierce as Vinny kept calling him, piped up and said that "Marilu is not going to kill you". Curious how in the boardroom there was not a chair for Vinny-hum..too much over kill.
And I loved it when Vinny said that Piers called him a "fat Italian" which Piers, said, "no I called you a very fat Italian". I swear, Piers could say all the cuss words in the english language and they would sound like he's reading Shakespeare.
Had not for Vinny offering up his resignation, in the end, it almost looked like Piers was going to get fired, his face turning all pasty and sweaty, and his usually caustic English mouth snapped shut like two thin veal chops. Hey, have you noticed how Baldwin and Trump share the same doughy little eyes? In the end, The Donald had to let Vinny go, had he not offered himself up like some sacrificial lamb-Piers would have been ambushed, like Sonny, at the toll booth, his car riddled with bullets-but oh I digress! -Single D

Wednesday, January 30, 2008

American Idol-OMY-Ha!

American Idol is in the Heartland-Omaha, Nebraska with one of the first contestants bearing gifts, but not of the musical kind. Chris did manage to charm his way to a Simon referral for Omaha's Fox 42 to get him a gig hosting an Idol talk show. Well, if you can't sing, talk! Jason forgot the lyrics, but was given a pardon by the judges and was passed through, now don't forget the lyrics in Hollywood or you're history! I think the scariest person at the auditions in Omaha and probably in the entire state of Nebraska was Sarah formally known aptly as Lady Morgue (she wrestles). Sinister, ghoulish, freaky, weird, just a few adjectives come to mind-and what's with the eye make-up? Certainly not for the weak at heart-which it seems she throughly and ghoulishly enjoys. I never, ever want to meet her in a dark alley! -Single D

Gone Country-

As I was remote surfing the other night, I did my momentary pause on the CMT channel. Now, I never watch CMT, can't say I'm a country music fan, the closest thing to liking country music would be Carrie Underwood singing that Louieville Slugger song. But as I paused, I noticed the fresh face, hey isn't that Diana DiGarmo from Idol fame? What's she doing with those people and who are those people anyway? I did recognize Maureen-Marsha, Marsha, Marsha from the Brady Bunch and she's definitely has not had any cosmetic work! She totally reminded me of someone's grandmother. Stop! Carney Wilson, love her but psst-she's getting fat again! Girl just let go, eat what you want, life's too short, that's my philosophy ...but who were all those other people? I actually had to look them up-ok, I'm not up on the latest singers/rappers/rockers (are they called singers anymore?) Well, here's the cast of characters-Dee Snider (Twisted Sister fame), isn't Dee a girl's name, don't know his music, Sisqo from Dru Hill (never heard of him), Julio honey Iglesias Jr.-one word, yummy! and Bobby Brown, I know him from Whitney Houston-LOVE HER! I came in this episode when they were wondering who is that person joining them, landing in some special private plane-and out walks Bobby Brown. He's not as arrogant as I thought he was. Actually, Maureen and Bobby strike up an unlikely friendship, based mostly on cigarettes. I was pleasantly surprised to find him polite and nice, maybe Whitney was the Bit--h after all!
They all arrive at this immense Log and Glass home (somewhere in Nashville), I'm guessing it belongs to the guy in the private helicopter that lands in the front lawn, wearing a pack of dead animals on his back. Yo PETA! They all call him JR, as in John Rich of Big and Rich-sorry guys, never heard of him either or his songs.
The premises of this reality show is that these seven diverse musical talents (Maureen?) will be in Nashville to write and perform a country song, but first having to prove themselves to JR, by going through a series of which I'm sure, silly stunts.
Well, Dee starts off with a good impression by telling JR he doesn't like country songs, "all about your hound dog, your truck's broken, your wife's left ya, you've lost your job", then he begins to sob that there is no coffee-I NEED COFFEE he wails, raising the eyebrows of JR and the rest at the table. JR sits at the head like he's holding court, addressing each one, and solicitiously thanking them for joining in this adventure as he makes a sly look toward DiGarmo's cleavage. JR complements our Marsha Brady on her voice to which Dee remarks on the aside that he didn't know that she had a song let alone sang. Meanwhile Dee's still whining about coffee and for Carney it's all about the food-country cooking at it's finest.
In their bedrooms, each one has a guitar, a gift from JR all done up in rhinestones-which makes Maureen cry-I'm thinking she's going to be the crier of the bunch. Julio kept a low profile, but how's he going to sing country with that Spanish accent? While Bobby and Maureen enjoy a smoke, Dee finds a coffeemaker, coffee, to which he quickly announces when he opens it, that it's a can from 1946! He's definitely the high maintenance one of the group-Dee go find yourself a Starbucks!
This does look like a promising series and maybe I'll keep you posted after all, I'll be curious to see whose alittle bit country and whose alittle bit rock and roll-where's Donny and Marie?-Single D

Sunday, January 27, 2008

Ghost Hunters International - Scotland & England

Edinburgh Scotland - The Ragged School. This school was started so that poor children in the area could get an education. Sightings of a man is seen in the attic and various sounds are heard. Donna & Shannon in the attic don't get much action but Donna keeps getting chills. Could be Scottish ghosts like her too! Meanwhile Brian, in the command center, reports a shadow running past him but he didn't go after it, so no evidence. Come on Brian, you have been at this long enough not to grab a video camera and go ghost hunting! Barry & Robb go to the basement and see a light flash in one of the rooms but fail to find a source. A brief glimmer of hope of capturing something on film when Brian, in the basement, takes a picture and it shows a black mass. Barry quickly explains it away. Darn! Andy and Shannon are in the attic alone and in separate corners when Andy hears a footstep. Shannon, already nervous, has the most priceless facial expressions and is clearly not a happy camper. While reviewing the tapes, the team hears a response to Robb asking a spirit if he has a different name, the answer was a clear "yes". Another recorder, which was left in a room alone, produced a creepy "outta here"! Andy did catch a face on a wall with his digital camera which was not there in subsequent photos. Donna fails to see it making her ask the guys if one has to have a Y chromosome to see it. I too did not see the face until it was pointed out. While interviewing a woman who lived at the school, the team receives some photographs of others who lived there. One of the photographs appears to match the face on the wall. Robb declares the school haunted. Next we are back in England to investigate Belgrave Hall in Leicester. It was built in 1709 on two acres of walled gardens. Security cameras at one time caught what appears to be two figures coming out of the gardens toward the house and then disappear. The team watch this video and successfully debunk it as someone in a reflective jogging suit. While in the dining room with Shannon, Donna gets an eerie feeling and starts snapping photos. She catches a reddish haze in a couple of photos and other photos do not have it. When asked if someone is there with them during the photo session, they catch a "yes" on EVP. The security camera again catches a light moving by itself in the courtyard. Attempts to recreate it are unsuccessful. Verdict - haunted! Double D