The Llamas family photos

The mother Michele

The father-Lorenzo

The daughter-Shane

The Bachelor-London Calling-Hollywood Ending

Gee, life is a Hollywood ending! An English bachelor comes calling and ends up with the American Dream and a Hollywood ending, but more on that later. Matt takes his remaining two women, Chelsea and Shayne to London to meet his parents, Trish and Tony and his brother, Simon. Sorry Simon, but Matt inherited the good looks in the family. Matt comes from your typical English stock, prim and proper parents, living in the typical English house you might expect, old English furniture and large paintings with gold gilt frames. Matt takes Chelsea for a ride on the Eye. When I was in London, that wasn't even built yet. Chelsea goes to meet Matt's parents for dinner at their house. Simon remarks on how pretty she is. To me it seems that Chelsea is trying really hard to impress Matt's parents, a little too hard. Matt's mom seems so nice and down to earth. I was wondering where dad Tony was during this, he just disappeared.

The next day, Matt meets Shayne and takes her on a double decker bus ride to see the sights of London. Shayne's outfit is very cute. Snaps! Shayne is amazed at London and says it looks like it's out of the movies. For someone being raised in a Hollywood family, she has done very little traveling. My daughter has more flier miles than she does! At first Simon said that he didn't think she was the right match for Matt, but then after talking with her, he thought her very mature and nice. Our blondie showed her confidence and maturity and held up to the scrunity of the meet the parents. The only time Matt's dad said anything was when Matt asked his family which one they liked better and he said Shayne. Go pops!

Back in Barbados and the Hilton, there's that Hilton sign again, the girls have one last date with Matt. Chelsea gives Matt a present, a cooler bag with cereal and surf board wax, not very romantic if you ask me. Just goes to show how there's not the warm and fuzzy vibe between them! She says it's for breakfast in bed. If I'm having breakfast in bed it better be croissants, scones, jelly and cappuccinos! And the wax is to teach Matt how to surf when he comes to California. Chelsea tells Matt that she's falling in love with him, but during their whole time together, she just seems so awkward and clumsy in the relationship and there's absolutely no chemistry there. Unlike Shayne, who seems so utterly at ease with Matt, gripping onto him like a baby chimp. Shayne and Matt's last date is para sailing which looked like so much fun. Shayne tells Matt "see what I do for you"!

Shayne's present to Matt is two frames with pictures of herself writing "I love you" in the sand. Now that's romantic! Matt still doesn't give us any hints of whom he's choosing, telling each one of them that he is falling in love with them. Is he allowed to say the "L" word?

Matt chooses the Tacori diamond ring, absolutely beautiful. He was holding it while standing on the balcony over the ocean, I was afraid he would drop it in the ocean! yikes!

I always get so nervous when the limos pull up, nervously pacing...which one will be the first one, like that would tell me which one he picks? Of course I'm hoping Shayne wins. The votes on our blog show the most votes cast for Shayne! Looks like America agrees. Out of the first limo is Chelsea, in a long flowing Grecian style dress. She goes to Matt and he shows no sign of nervousness. He gives her the customary, I think you're wonderful speech and then drops the but.....I've fallen in love with someone else! I was so ecstatic! There is a God after all!

Chelsea is crushed but manages to keep her composure until for one split second she blurted out "You picked the most falsest one!". Matt shot back "if you think I did, then you don't know me! "

In the next limo, Shayne makes her way to Matt, wearing a billowy yellow chiffon cocktail dress with her hair in a up swept duo and long bangs. I'm wondering if those diamond bracelets both ladies had on were real? Shayne meets Matt and he proceeds to tell her that she is amazing and that he has loved every second that they had together and then he drops to one knee as Shayne cries "Matt, Matt!" I could weep! It was so romantic! He says "Monkey, will you marry me?" It was just the perfect Hollywood ending with a montage of their bachelor journey. In the end, this season of London Calling was just perfect. I hope Matt and Shayne will be able to keep it going, but knowing the rate of breakup, that might be hard. Shayne's last word to him was "Matt, you have to promise me not to look at any other women, because you have looked at too many women during our relationship." Very funny! I'm just wondering if Shayne will be willing to give up her acting career for Matt and move to London? That's the big question mark in that ending, nonetheless, it was simply jolly well perfect! -Single D

It's the final two in London to meet the parents. Chelsea goes first and Matt takes her up in the London Eye. Not your typical ferris wheel with its stand up, glass enclosed gondolas with an amazing view. That would have been one of my "face my fear" things that Matt finds so sexy. On to Matt's parents house. Matt's brother Simon looked so serious until he tells Chelsea if she moves to England she will have to bring her Wellies. Matt's "mum" does all the grilling on Chelsea while his father was not very much a part of the picture. All I can say is Matt's family is obviously well-to-do with a huge house in London. Unless it's all staged and they really live in a two room flat in London's ghetto.

Next up is Shayne. He takes her to Hyde Park and on a double decker bus tour around the city. At the house bro Simon wasn't real sure about Shayne but she really warmed up to them and them to her. Matt's father asks Shayne how old she is to which she responded 12. I think she had them in the palm of her hand after that.

After Shayne leaves, Matt sits with his family to get their reaction to the two women. Mum & dad like Shayne saying she seems the more genuine of the two while Simon likes Chelsea. I say Simon wants Matt to pick Chelsea so he can have a crack at Shayne!

It's back to Barbados for one last date before the big rose ceremony. Matt takes Chelsea on a helicopter tour which ends up on a secluded beach. Chelsea looks like she finally has loosened up a bit and is actually having fun with Matt. She gives Matt a California Survival Kit consisting of cereal for breakfast in bed, surf wax because she wants to teach him to surf and a map for all of their travels. I thought it was clever, maybe not so romantic but clever.

Matt is still calling Shayne monkey, apparently because she clings to him as a monkey would. Matt takes her parasailing with her squealing all the way. Later, Shayne gives him a present of pictures of her writing I love you in the sand saying this is the most important present you will ever get from me. What no more imagination? After telling her she is the warmest, most genuine person he has ever met, she looks up, while rubbing her eyes and asks "did you like my present?" Now I like Shayne but, in that moment, she looked every bit a child being put to bed by a doting guardian.

At the rose ceremony, Chelsea arrives first all hopeful but gets the "I'm sorry but" speech from Matt. My heart went out to her because she did take so long to open up. I just hope she doesn't shut herself off from finding someone who can love her for herself.

Come on, didn't we all know it was going to be Shayne? Young, gorgeous, potential movie income what red blooded man wouldn't go for that? So Matt asks "monkey" to marry him to which she happily agrees.

As they stare into the sunset, we look forward to the Bachelorette next week! Double D

The Bachelor-London Calling-Bachelorette Reunion-The Women Tell All

Well, this reunion of the bachelorettes was pretty tame and they really didn't tell us anything that we didn't already know. Come on Chris, take some lessons from cutie Jeff Probst and stir the pot alittle. The women were just too polite. We wanted truths, lies and videotapes! Chris Hansen starts out by calling on Stacy and her infamous act of giving Bachelor Matt her lacy g-string upon their first meeting. She says that's not really me and that she felt pressure to make herself stand out from the crowd. Well, she stood out alright, as the skank of the bunch, nice going! Chris didn't pry it out of her that maybe her consumption of alcohol had something to do with that. I'm surprised that she could even remember that after passing out, oh yeah, she would be missing something!

Next in the hot seat was Robyn (does she look 22, more like 32!) who ticked off all the ladies by saying that she wanted to win this competition. What was it a rugby game or something and Matt the trophy? Well, she'll definitely not win any Miss Congeniality sashes in this competition along with Marshana, who was just so uncompromising in her self assessment of her sassy self. I think Marshana has become infamous in her "walk-off" comment. She was even on Ellen proclaiming that sassy "walk-off" comment as her own. She nonetheless, looked great in that outfit and I was glad that she made it that far. She did try to make a weak attempt to give kudos to the quality of women that were left in the running.

Chris Hansen said to Amanda that she managed to pull off one of the funniest pranks in Bachelor history by hiring the fake parents. But Amanda said that she initially thought when Matt didn't chose her at the final three rose ceremony that maybe he was pranking her to get back? What convoluted thinking. Now that's desperation. She says that she went into that ceremony pretty confident that she would get a rose and was devastated when she didn't. After all, didn't he try to convince her fake dad that he really liked her? Poor Amanda, America's sweetheart goes home roseless. I noticed not all the bachelorettes were present, like the singing clarinet player, Michelle P and where was the white house aide worker...what's her name?

When Matt made his entrance I was wondering, why the shaved head, and when Chris asked him if he was doing a Beckham, Matt brushed it off. Shaven head and a gruffy beard. I just didn't like it. He didn't look so cute and his new look made his nose look even longer-sorry Matt! Grow your hair back and shave that 5 0'clock shadow. I tried looking for clues on who Matt chose as the last woman standing. Matt did say that the women, Chelsea and pause here.....Shayne are wonderful. Ah, did he say Chelsea's name first for a reason? Was she the one that he picked? Why hadn't he said Shayne's name first? Ah, but I speculate. I'm still hoping that it's Shayne's finger that diamond ring goes on. After all, doesn't he call her by his pet name "monkey". By the way, ABC your website on the Bachelor stinks-no pictures and no recaps. What's up with that?-Single D

The Bachelor, London Calling-Final Two

The last three dates takes place in Barbados. What dream dates. So gorgeous! Shayne is the first date with Matt, meeting him at the beach wearing a big floppy hat and big sunglasses. She's like a cross between Jayne Mansfield and Marilyn Monroe. Her and Matt spend the day in the water jet skiing and swimming. Looks like so much fun. There is even a water trampoline where Shayne shows off her gymnastic abilities. They look like they were having a great time. At dinner, Matt wants to see if there is a serious, intellectual side to Shayne. Careful Matt, you can't have it all in one package, sex kitten and rocket scientist. At dinner, Matt asks Shayne if she is knowledgeable of the world or is she just putting on a show, like when she asked "Are there palms trees in London?" After the dinner, Matt of course hands her the fantasy suite card which she reads and of course accepts. The suite looked awesome. If I were reading the fantasy card to Matt, just for kicks, I would have read, sorry guys the fantasy suite is under repair, you have to sleep on the beach! ha!

For his next date, Matt describes Amanda as a great prankster, having great parents and simply stunning. Did he call anyone else stunning? No! Amanda and Matt do a zip line activity, which looks really fun and is the perfect choice for athletic Amanda. Amanda says she's afraid of heights, so I thought she would start hiccuping like crazy, but she managed to control it, good girl! Amanda reminds me that she could be related to Maria Schriver, you know Mrs. Arnold Schwarzenegger?

She too accepts the fantasy suite without skipping a single beat, Amanda, not Maria.

The final date is with Chelsea. Matt was displeased that she came off in the beginning of the date, cold and distant. He said all that ground they covered from the last date was gone and that he would have to start all over. Chelsea was acting really stand offish and didn't look like she was having any fun swimming with the turtles and fishes. That turtle was really friendly, letting Matt touch it and swim really close to it. It reminded me of when we were in Hawaii and we swam with the turtles. They wouldn't have anything to do with us, but it was really amazing. Chelsea on the other hand was off swimming in the distance, leaving Matt to comment that he was getting more attention from the turtles than Chelsea. Ya think? Chelsea's definitely a cold fish! At dinner, Chelsea said that she was afraid to be close to him because she's afraid of getting hurt. Hello, you signed up for this gig! You knew what you were getting into. To prove that she really digs Matt at the fantasy suite, she slips into something black and lacy and throws her panties to the wayside. There's no guessing if they did the naughty there.

By the way, did you notice how many times they showed the Hilton sign? ABC must have gotten discounted rooms for the free advertisement.

In the end, I thought he would say goodbye to Chelsea, since she is not very giving of herself, but in the end he sends a tearful Maria Schriver, I mean Amanda away. Now I had a suspicion that Amanda would be the last woman standing, since people have been searching our blog to see if Amanda won the Bachelor. Well, now my suspicion is dispelled. It's not Amanda. It's between Chelsea and Shayne who in two weeks go to London to meet his parents. Looks like a very stuffy encounter and I can't wait to see who he chooses. My guess, just simple observation- WARNING SPOILER HERE! The ring looks like it is placed on Shayne's hand, she always wears her nails short with clear nail polish, where Chelsea always wears black or dark nail polish. I could be wrong here, but that was just an observation. My thoughts in reality, Shayne is too young at 22 and an aspiring actress. Can Matt deal with that and her immaturity, not to mention her love of purses, sunglasses, and hats? Chelsea on the other hand is a better match, but can he put up with someone whose not very affectionate and doesn't even like to hold hands? I like Shayne better, but I think I'm the one better suited for Matt than anyone there, so Matt...Call me!

Next week's episode is the reunion bitterfest, with the returning bachelorettes, sure to be full of spiteful attacks. Two weeks till the finale. Can't wait!-Single D

To be in Barbados walking on the beach swimming in the surf, oh sorry, I'm supposed to be blogging on the Bachelor! OK, so Matt is there, and I'm here :( First up is Shayne on the beach, not me, don't worry about me, I'll get over it. Where else would you go for a date in Barbados? The beach! Shayne shows up and they do the jetski, water trampoline thing. Matt says he wants to see the intelligent Shayne. She may be smart about some things but an intellectual she ain't. Matt also keeps calling her his "little monkey". That to me is a pet name for a little kid not a potential mate. Shayne does act like a little kid sometimes. She tells Matt she is falling in love with him and, not to miss the moment, gives her the fantasy suite card which she happily accepts. The camera fades out showing the two of them in the suites swimming pool in a lip lock. Aren't those two water logged by now?

Matt takes Amanda zip lining. Hey, I just did that in Mexico (see Gone Cruisin' below)! They are both afraid of heights and Matt thinks it's sexy to face their fears together. I could think of a lot more sexy things to do than being afraid! At dinner Amanda stammers over her words with every other word being "like". Amanda practically dives for Matt when he gives her the fantasy suite card. At least it's a different room than the one he had with Shayne.

Chelsea goes out on a catamaran with Matt. Matt was looking for romance and Chelsea wasn't biting. Chelsea better warm up or no fantasy suite for her! After a day swimming with the turtles and sailing on the boat they go to dinner where Matt just comes out with it and asks her what's up? She finally lays her emotions on the table and a happy Matt gives her the fantasy suite card. In the suite, Chelsea, her walls down, gushes her feelings and, so there was no doubt, surprises Matt by changing into a lacy black nightie sans panties.

The bootie call complete, it's time for the roses. Matt keeps Shayne and Chelsea leaving Amanda to mend her broken heart. As Matt says goodbye to Amanda, I got the feeling like she wanted to like hit him like. She can like go back to like Florida and like squeeze some like oranges. Matt is SO picking Shayne! Double D

The Bachelor-London Calling-Final Four Home Dates

I always love the home dates as we get to peek into their private lives and see what their families are like. The first home date was to Shayne's house in LA where the bachelor has to learn how to say her last name, yamas, lama, say it with me Matt, Llamas! Shayne and her father (you know the famous one) Lorenzo, meet at a restaurant where Lorenzo proceeds to tell Matt that the only reason Shayne is on the Bachelor is because she wants to be a movie star. Shayne was so upset at this and proceeds to confess her undying love to Matt. At this Shayne's father says that it was just a ruse to get Shayne to reveal her true feelings. After meeting the father, it's off to see Shayne's mom side. Somewhere in the burbs of LA lives Shayne's mother and sister in the house that Shayne bought. I'm sorry to say that Shayne's mother is a causality of the bad plastic surgery trend that is sweeping LA, which is unfortunate. Shayne's sister is an exact cookie cutter of Shayne. The house is decorated in yesterday's designs gone wrong decor and somewhere out there are a pack of leopards missing their coats. The next two dates are replicas of each other with Chelsea's parents and Noelle parents exactly alike and lo and behold, they live in the same state, Colorado. No need to recap there. The final and best date is with Amanda somewhere in Florida, called Niceville, is that near Pleasantville? Amanda has arranged for actors to portray her parents to pull one over on Matt. This whole segment was so hysterical, as the actor mom, wearing a low cut top acts aggressive by caressing Matt's arms and chest as he states that's my nipple. Actor mom then proceeds to hug on him, brushing her ample chest up against him, trying to kiss him like Mrs. Robinson. Actor dad acts all angry and stern, he has the supporting role. Matt tried to act cool, but surely he was flustered. What would someone do in that situation? One word...awkward! When finally Amanda comes out, she tells Matt that he's been punk'd. Whoo hoo, Matt, this one's on you! Very funny stuff and if Amanda is the last one standing, this will make a good story for the grand kids. In the end, Matt's connection with Noelle is the weakest and he sends Ms. Dimples back home to Loveland, Colorado.-Single D The first hometown date is LA LA land with Shayne where Matt learns to pronounce Lorenzo Llamas. Yes Matt, you should be able to say your girlfriend's last name! It sounded like dad was belittling Shayne by saying the only reason she went on the Bachelor was to be on TV. Shayne was obviously embarrassed by this and kept insisting that she was falling for Matt. Dad seemed happy with Matt so it's off to see mom. Arriving at Shayne's mother's house, we see that Shayne's sister is her twin only a few years younger. Her mother has had a few too many botox injections and she could stand to lose a coat or three of mascara. They do seem like a fun happy family, with all of the leopard skin stuff and dressing like flower children, who wouldn't be happy. Just what was in that roast? After dinner, Shayne's mom shows Matt a video of one of Shayne's dance recitals. I just know Matt is going to pick Shayne, especially after seeing that video and how flexible she is! Off to Durango, Colorado and Chelsea. Her parent's home looks beautiful with gorgeous views of the surrounding hills. This visit was pretty uneventful, ok it was down right boring. At least Matt got to stay in the same state for the next visit with Noelle in Loveland, CO. Matt & Noelle ride in on horses to see her family who are all lined up on one side of a picnic table like the inquisition. I was surprised the picnic table didn't fall over. After dinner, Noelle's sisters take Matt outside to grill him. Again, yawn! I'm so not seeing Matt with Noelle anyway. Tallahassee, FL and Amanda await. Amanda hired actors to play her mom & dad as a prank on Matt. Apparently he likes pranks. As fake mom hits on Matt, he just sits there and takes it even when fake mom rubs his nipple and rubs herself against him. It was pretty funny but Amanda puts an end to the prank before Matt could run screaming from the house. He thought the prank was a good one so it all ends well with Matt meeting the real parents. Noelle gets sent home leaving three to go to Barbados! Double D

The Bachelor London-Final Four Bachelorettes

Only six bachelorettes left, gee where did this season go? Chris Hanson tells the girls that there will be 2 one on one dates and one group date, but pack your bags because it's off to Sun Valley Idaho. The girls get all giddy, like girl scouts on a camping trip. Sun Valley looks absolutely awesome and what better way to snuggle up to bachelor Matt that with all that snow. Chelsea gets the lucky single date, a sleigh ride with cocoa. Marshana was a little bit exuberant that Robyn didn't get the single date, hey me too! Marshana hugging Chelsea like she had won the lottery or something. While Robyn fumes, why didn't he pick me! Come on Robyn, he's probably so sick of you by now, you've weaseled your way into everyone's time with him. Matt wants to see if Chelsea is more than a good friend or will she open up and show her affectionate side. The sleigh is pulled by those beautiful Clydesdale horses through a open meadow of pure white snow. What a perfect setting. Chelsea tells Matt that she's not affectionate and that she doesn't like to to hold hands (well, maybe because she has man hands?). Come on girl, reveal that later when you've got the ring on the finger. Matt tells her he likes to hold hand and to be affectionate. Hey Matt, you want to snuggle with me? Back at his digs, Chelsea really wants to prove her undying love to him, so she writes a note of her own, inviting herself into his fantasy suite. And guess what, he accepts, now what guy would turn down a free booty call? Do they really do it? After the date and back at the condo, the girls are innocently chatting when all of sudden, girls being girls, start to get into it. Of course Cruella di Vil, Robyn, made some snide remark to Marshana, which Marshana just went off, and then Chelsea piped in that it seemed like Marshana didn't really want to be there. Marshana then went into her sweeping hand pounding, head moving gestures and Shayne had to step in as peacemaker. Hey, did they buy all those knit caps the girls were wearing on the slopes? Marshana says she has been nothing but nice, friendly, giving and charitable. Well......not exactly Mother Teresa. For the group date, Shayne, Marshana, Amanda and Robyn hit the slopes. Marshana and Amanda are as Matt puts it, snow virgins as they don't know how to ski. Shayne impresses Matt with her snowboarding abilities and he promptly rewards her with a kiss on the slopes which is rudely interrupted by, you guessed it, Robyn. Robyn weasles her way in, again, and lays in the snow her lips in pursed askance for a kiss from Matt. The kiss looked cold as ice. Matt's date with Noelle is to an ice skating rink. Even though they were engaged in a very physical sport of not falling down on the ice, Matt doing a very nice ice robot imitation, Matt did manage to get a sense of what Noelle is all about. Noelle seems like a very nice girl, like Amanda, they could be sisters! No roses were given out on the dates, so only four roses to six girls. Back in LA, Robyn ask Matt, why she wasn't asked out on the one on one. Matt said that he knew what she was about, I bet, to which she said that was what she needed to hear. No, you only hear what you want to hear! I'm sorry, but I don't know why I can't stand her, oh yeah, because she steals everyone else's time, she tries to steal the show and she's just plain, plain, plain yogurt. Matt gives the roses to Shayne, first pick, Amanda, Noelle and surprise, man hands, Chelsea. I thought for sure he would pick Robyn over Chelsea, but he sent Robyn and Marshana packing. Marshana managed to remain a lady and said that she will take her little self back to Brooklyn, where she belongs. I was kinda of sorry to see Marshana go, would like to see an ethnic woman make it to the final four. Robyn on the other hand, if looks could kill, they would have sent a thousand daggers into our bachelor. Her icy stare and curt "Bon Soir" had all the ring tones of a woman scorned. Can you say fatal attraction! Move over Alex! I can't wait for the hometown dates, sure to be filled with awkward and strange family moments.-Single D

The bachelorettes are turned into snow bunnies because it's off to Sun Valley, Idaho for this edition of the bachelor. Once there and everyone is in their snow gear, Matt gets all playful throwing the girls in the snow. Marshana thinks she is all that in her outfit and didn't want to get all snowy. That didn't stop Matt from chasing her down and tossing her in a snow drift. Too bad he couldn't have left her there.

Chelsea gets the first one on one sleigh ride. I agree, how romantic does that get?! Except that Chelsea seems to be more of a friend than a lover, until she decides to make her own fantasy suite card for Matt. Matt seems to be pretty happy about that. My husband is still trying to figure out a way to get on that show, gee dear does the word BACHELOR mean anything to you? We can arrange that! Just don't forget there is a Bachelorette show too!

Anyway, back on the slopes and Marshana can't stand on skis while Shayne has her whole makeup stash in her ski jacket. Matt & Shayne are sharing a moment when in comes Robyn. Shayne graciously leaves (that girl knows how to make them wanting more) leaving Matt with the barracuda who says all she wants to know is why she hasn't been chosen for a one on one date. Matt reassures her that they had a connection early on and she is satisfied for now.

Noelle gets the next one on one date which is ice skating (Single D's favorite sport). They talk about life changing events and scars and that seems to bring Matt closer to Noelle, but then again what doesn't bring Matt closer to anyone? Can I have a shot?

Marshana goes on a rampage when she is called negative but she sees herself as loving and giving. Raise your hands, who does this remind you of, Omarosa maybe?! She also seems to drink to anything.

In the end Marshana goes home saying she will leave the lady that she came in as. As she leaves she trips over her dress, what does that say? And a big SEE YA to Robyn! Double D

The Bachelor-London Calling-Tea and Tennis

This episode features a group date, tea and tennis, a single date, and a two on one. Matt chooses Chelsea, Kelly, Robyn, Shayne, Ashley and Noelle for the tennis date. Shayne shows off her gymnastic talents by doing cartwheels and flips. Who knew she had gymnastic talents? Ashley still tries to impress Matt with her singing and songwriting abilities. She keeps saying that she wants to be known for more than her songwriting abilities. I didn't know she was known for that in the first place. She is way too immature for Matt. All she can do is sing badly written songs and giggle when she's with him. It's like watching a terrible B movie. Chelsea displays her tennis abilities on the court, but it is Robyn who takes center court at the tea table explaining how her family is all into drinking tea. Whoop dee do! This was a roll your eyes moment when she explained how her mother searched all over for an actual teapot maker to brew her tea like coffee. Robyn even takes on a British accent while explaining this. I think all the girls had their fingers down their throats during this monologue. Matt says to her during their 10 minute one on one, that she almost has a British accent to her speech. Hey Matt don't you want real American and not bad fake British? The girls, mainly Shayne, once again get on Robyn for her selfish behavior and it's all about me speeches. Robyn starts crying. I have to give props to Shayne for speaking up and telling Robyn that she has to play fair. Shayne really surprises me in her mature attitude. Snaps for Shayne! Looks like Matt is smitten with Chelsea's physical prowess on the court and gives her the rose.

The single date goes to Amanda, the hiccupping chipmunk. Matt takes her to a fifties diner, where they dine on diner food and dance a little dance. I was surprised that she didn't display her hiccupping talents to him. Amanda actually seems like a really nice sweet girl and that must have come across because Matt gave her a rose.

The two on one date went to Marshana and Holly. Both seemed so nervous, especially Marshana as the stakes were really high, one would get the rose, one would get the boot. Going into this Marshana knows she's the underdog, Holly having the movie premiere date with Matt.

It's dinner at Matt's house, where Marshana shows up wearing a chef's hat, very cute. Matt takes each one aside. Matt asks Holly that he needs not only laughs but also someone who can make him think. Holly comes up with a blank. Hey Holly, where are your creativity skills now? Marshana tells Matt, no risk no gain and they kiss, her lips like two big cushions again his skinny British pucker. He must have liked it, because in the end he gives Marshana the rose and Holly is crushed. I was totally surprised and pleased by this. Good for her. Finally a woman of color gets a chance in the game. When the driver goes to the house to pick up the suitcases, the girls are dying to see which ones go out of the house. Gasps could be hear throughout LA as Holly's suitcases are whisked away.

The night of the elimination Matt talks to Kelly and asks her why she's remained in the background as she sits with her arms folded around herself. She immediately corrects her body language, maybe alittle too much, by baring her breast to him. I don't know what made her shove her breast in his face, it must have been the stress to please, but he was totally shocked. Kelly seems nice enough, if you didn't think she was drunk all the time.

Matt sends home, Kelly and songbird, or songchick Ashely. Thank goodness, because if I have to listen to another lame song, I might have to stop watching as she was still singing as she made her exit!-Single D

The Bachelor-London Calling All Bimbos

I just can't help it, the women on this show are either bowsers or bimbos. I wish I could say that he is weeding out the bowsers and bimbos, but it's seems that's all there is. This weeks episode featured two single dates and one group date. Holly and Shayne were picked for the single dates and the pack got the group date of playing Rugby. Oh help, the last thing I would want to do is sweat in front of a would be boyfriend. Holly, the children's book writer, ok, she's cute and has a real job, got the movie date with Matt. I'm so stupid, maybe even borderline bimbo mentally, I really thought it was the actual premiere of the "Made of Honor", until they went into the theater and there was no one there except them. What a fabulous date and apparently a perfect evening for Holly and Matt. She's cute but is she Matt material? I'm curious as to why every date ends up in a hot tub. Is the location scout's only criteria a hot tub? Do they tell them to bring your swimsuit because you're getting wet? Holly managed to profess her love to Matt and was given a rose.

The group date was to play Rugby. Why is it that every guy says he digs it when a girl is all tough and sporty? Like I tell my friends at work, the only sport I ever watch must have the participants wearing sequins and have ice skates attached to their feet. Yes, I'm a figure skating junkie. I was so in heaven when all that Nancy Kerrigan and Tonya Harding stuff was going on. So much real life drama, I didn't even have to watch reality TV then! But I digress. What was up with Marshana? Oh I'm bleeding, I'm bleeding. Ok so she bit her lip, what a ploy to cling to Matt! After the game of Rugby, the girls were treated to massage, where Kelly displayed her massaging talents. Is that women drunk or what. She seems like she's always in a state of inebriation. She tried her hardest to get that rose, but Matt gave it to Robyn. What does Matt see in Robyn? She reminds me of some plain Jane Austen character waiting for her Mr. Darcy. There is always one woman that is hated in the house and Robyn is this season's choice. I can't stand her pushiness and weaseling her way into other girl's time. Will someone just slap her! woof, woof!

Shayne gets ready for her date as she wishes out loud that she could get a tan before her big evening. Much to her surprise, Holly tells her that she brought her spray tan. Now, I'm thinking spray tan in a bottle, not! She really meant a tan spray machine! How do you travel with one of those things? That's devotion.

Matt takes Shayne to a winery at Ojai. Hey, I used to live there! It's a sleepy bedroom community in the hills east of Ventura about 60 miles north of LA. It's beautiful there, very quite and serene, gee why did I ever leave there? Matt tells Shayne that he wants to know about her family, to which she says that you probably never heard of my father, Lorenzo Llamas, but he's really well known in the U.S. I'm thinking yeah, about 40 years ago, until, Terri, my BFF in New Jersey corrected me and said that I was thinking about her grandfather, Fernando Llamas, dud!....... I'd like to give a shout out to my BFF Terri, hey girl!

Matt seems hesitant with Shayne until they kiss and all is well with the world. Of course he's going to keep Shayne, as he said, she's your typical LA sex kitten. I'm wondering why did she leave on those boots when they were lounging on the blanket in front of the fireplace (no hot tub here)? So far, I'm rooting for Shayne. Any girl who admits she's high maintenance, loves cars, shoes, handbags, sunglasses, and watches is ok in my book!

The evening of the elimination, Robyn is on the prowl to keep the women away from Matt and Amanda gets nervous and starts hiccuping. Did I tell you my father has had the hiccups for 4 years now? Amanda's hiccups sounds like she swallowed a chipmunk, is Alvin in there?

Matt sends Amy, Kristine and the hot dog vendor, Erin home, humm..... hot dog vendor, I didn't know that was a real job?-Single D

For Holly's one on one date, they go to a movie premiere, I too thought it was a real premiere and thought how cool is this? Then they went into an empty theater and it's like OK I get it now. Well at least they got their hands in cement, what a keepsake! Holly is cute, maybe not so smart as she is dragging her suitcase down the stairs backwards and can't figure out why it isn't rolling. But, hey that seems to be what most of these bachelors want.

Rugby time! The girls catch on pretty quick how to play the game much to Matt's pleasure. Does he want soft and cuddly or hard and dirty? Maybe soft and dirty. I think he just liked watching girls in short shorts tackling each other, another guy thing. After the match, they go back to Matt's house and are treated to massages and, you guessed it, a hot tub. Kelly, who I think looks like a crack head, was trying to get down and dirty while massaging Matt. If he had rolled over he would gotten an eye (as well as a lap) full. Robyn gets a little alone time with Matt and says she doesn't want to do anything stupid but will do whatever it takes to stay in the game and get to know him better. Matt gives a rose to Robyn saying she had the best moves on the Rugby field. Chelsea thought she was the best player and Kelly thought she should have received the rose for her moves in the massage room

I thought Holly was being pretty gracious to spray tan Shayne for her date with Matt. Most girls would have put blue dye or something in the spray thing but not Holly and the two had a bonding moment. Shayne goes on her date with Matt to a winery, how fun! Shayne tells Matt she has never done a wine tasting before. I find that very hard to believe, something tells me she has tasted quite a bit of wine, or something. Shayne admits to Matt that she is falling for him and would live in a shoebox if that's what it would take to be with him. Something tells me that wouldn't last too long.

Amy, Erin and Kristine are sent home. Kristine says she usually sits back and waits for the man to say he is interested in her before she opens up. Hey, this is a competition girl speed dating at it's finest, you can't wait for him darlin' you have jump in with both feet and come out swimming! Just ask Robyn. It does still amaze me, the women who profess their love for a man they have known for about 10 minutes. One of my girlfriends married her husband after knowing him for 6 days but that was 6 days of quality one on one dates, still a little short for me but it's working for them. Double D

The Bachelor-London Calling

One word to describe these bunch of American women-painful! It happened twice last night when watching "The Bachelor". It was a yikes, go hide in a cave moment, when not one, but two women sang for the affections of Matt. Aw come on, I know Matt wanted to double over and pee his pants in fits of laughter when Miss, I brought my clarinet, started to sing a song she made up about the bachelor. It was just awkward and squeamish. What is just so pitiful is that she probably thinks she's really good. She was just so earnest! Another woman attempting to woo Matt with her musical stylings was Robin. Gee, how old is she? She's like twenty years older than him, ok, five years older. The problem with her is that she comes off so desperate! And that opera voice, gag me! Summertime and the bachelor is queasy! Well, enough of my singing. Downright embarrassing and the other girls, especially Marshawn was flabbergasted! Matt divided his time between two dates, one runway modeling group date and the other group date was to Vegas. I'm thinking the first group got gyped. All they got to do was model clothes down a runway, woo hoo! Matt had to give a rose to one of the girls on this date and he chose, Ashlee, because get this, she was the most forward. Ah, now we know what he's looking for! He could have by passed all this and dialed some 900 number and get the same result. Ashlee is way too young for him. She acts like she's thirteen, "can you pass this note to Matt in study hall"? Plus the fact that she likes to stick out her very unattractive tongue, is she related to Gene Simmons? What's up with women and pointing out their tongues, yuck! But leave it to the unabashed trashy Ashlee to get the prize of the first kiss, careful that tongue! Marshawn when she's alone with Matt seems very nice and sincere and not all in your face like she gets when she's in the group. The second group got a date in Las Vegas. Each got 2, 000 dollars to gamble with and the one that ended up with the most money would win a private 30 minutes with Matt. Shayne, the actress, put all her money on red and lost it all in one fell swoop. You can tell, she has no concept of money, while all the other girls played conservatively. Kelly wins the 30 minutes with Matt. I'm wondering if she will remember that date because it looked like she was totally plastered, not a pretty sight. Meanwhile, Shayne is having a meltdown competing for Matt's attention. She's not used to the competition, she says men usually give her the roses. She's usually the one they compete for. Well, honey, why did you sign on, with all your suitors lining up, why bother? But it appears the only rose she's interested in is Matt's. I thought maybe she'd leave, but she managed to collect that blond hair, piled it high on her head, put a flowery headband on and asked for a second chance. I'm not a drama queen, really! Chelsea managed to win the second rose by displaying her ability to swing out her arms in a very repulsive double jointed poses and twirled her tongue which intrigued Matt. Hey Matt, are you auditioning women for the circus? That was just strange. Oh where have the normal girls gone? Poor Matt, it seems his choices in the bacherlorettes are slim. Fortunately he sent packing, Michelle, the singing clarinet player, Carrie, and Erin, the dark haired beauty that really didn't try to compete for his attention, girl what's the matter with you? I thought she was very pretty, give the brunettes a chance! Maybe she should have honed her singing talents more.-Single D

The Bachelor-London Calling

Oh yeah baby! A London bachelor to come calling on America's women. Aren't there women in London? Hey Stephanie Mills-McCartney is single again! I hope the producers put some sensible girls in the mix so that at least we can save our reputation that we're all not bimbos here. Seems like American women are viewed as big fake boobs, not educated, gold diggers, drunks, immature sleazy women with loose morals and no values. Well, enough about me, just kidding!

It's a perfect evening to meet the man of your dreams. It's rainy and cold as the limos pull up. When the girls step out of the limos, I almost expect to hear an announcer say, Miss Oklahoma, Miss Georgia, Miss California. Most of them pause, some twirl, but almost all make an embarrassing entrance. They always look funny to me and then somehow, I guess through the magic of TV, they become better looking as the episodes evolve. Oh by the way, how many times can Chris Hansen say 25 American women, 25 American women. Ok we know how many and we know they're American!

As the party begins, most of the girls start eyeing the first impression rose. To make an impression some of them brought their musical instruments, Michelle and her clarinet, Ashlee brought her guitar and sang a song (keep your day job honey), someone bit through a beer can, another a rock, paper, scissor champ (she lost on the first round!) and an arm wrestling champ (Matt pretended to lose). I didn't know this was a talent show! More like amateur hour.

The skank of the evening passed out thankfully and was passed over in the rose ceremony. He gave the first impression rose to Amanda, good choice. One girl that was passed over, unfortunately, was the Bush aide as she started talking politics. Nothing like sucking the fun out of the evening than to bring up politics. She should have tried to shine with just her personality and not rest on her previous laurels.

Anyway, should be an interesting series and Tom Bergeron (spoiler here!!) gave the secret away that he, Matt not Tom, found love and romance at the end of the game-Single D