Top Chef - 12 days of Christmas

This episode starts with Fabio & Stefan crying in their beer wondering what happened to them in the last episode because they are SO great, they couldn't possibly be on the bottom. Today is another day and another quick fire which is to make a holiday meal that can be made in one pot to be judged by the cooking diva herself, Martha Stewart. They have 45 minutes to make this one pot wonder so I was paying close attention. If something can be made in 45 minutes in one pot, that's for me!

Some of the dishes were Paella from Hosea (gee that rhymes), meatballs with mashed potato and pork loin with cabbage so I got a few ideas. Martha didn't like Fabio's polenta which Fabio couldn't believe and thought Martha was crazy. It was Ariane with another win when she made filet with cauliflower puree'. Talk about a come back, this girl is on a roll!

The elimination challenge is to make a dish based on the 12 days of Christmas to be judged at an AIDS fundraiser. What do you cook for 9 ladies dancing? The cheftestants (yes there is it again) prep their meals but the next day it was discovered that someone had left the fridge door open and Hosea & Radhika's dishes were spoiled. The other chefs pitched in and helped them both to make alternate dishes. Now there's team spirit! Stefan had the drummers so he made pot pie, OK. Fabio had the ladies dancing and made a "dancing" crab cake. Maybe he put in some Mexican jumping beans? Jeff with lords a leaping came up with potato risotto with pork and brussel sprouts. I guess the brussel sprouts with have you leaping the to the wash room. Ariane who has been on such a come back, makes deviled eggs which did not impress the judges and earned her a spot on the bottom. Hosea wins with his pork loin & chipotle mashed potatoes.

As the chefs are wondering who will be packing their knives, Chef Tom comes in and announces that everyones food pretty much sucked but since everyone banded together to help Hosea and Radhika, no one is getting sent home. So now it's off for some egg nog! Happy Holidays! Double D

Top Chef - Gail's Bridal Shower

We start out at the house where it's pretty clear Stefan has the hots for Jamie even though he knows she's gay. I guess he thinks he's so good that he can change her! Good luck with that Stefan.

It's the quick fire taste test with teams of 2 playing name that ingredient by bidding how many ingredients they can identify in a dish. Stefan goes in with his cocky self and gets all the way to the final round with Carla & Hosea. The final taste test is Mexican Mole' which Stefan clearly doesn't like. After Carla misses an ingredient it's down to an exciting finish in which Hosea & Stefan try out bidding each other. Hosea edges out sassy Stefan for the win. Go Hosea!

Here comes the bride for the elimination challenge. Gail is one brave woman to trust her bridal shower to the cheftestants, yes, that's right, cheftestants, kind of catchy you think? Gail arrived looking positively radiant. Even Padma couldn't outshine her this day. The challenge is to make dishes based on the poem Something old, something new, something borrowed, something blue. The cheftestants break up into teams with the "new" team going for a surf & turf sushi but Gene over cooks the rice and it comes out too sticky. So rather than making a new batch, he tries to make it work by adding chili pepper and calling it chili pepper sticky rice.

Chef Tom comes into the kitchen where he tells the chefs that since it's a girl thing, he has been banished to the kitchen and will do his tasting there. The "blue" team does a seafood theme, ocean, blue, get it? The "borrowed" team borrows from Radhika's Indian culture and makes lamb with French and Indian spices. The "old" team decides on an heirloom tomato theme and Jeff makes a tomato sorbet while Stefan keeps telling him it won't be good. Much to Stefan's displeasure, the judges say it was the one thing that made their dish. However, it was Ariane's lamb that wins her the challenge. I'm so jealous of her prize, she won a complete set of Calphalon cook ware as well as the new Calphalon electric ware.

It was the "new" team on the chopping block. Gene failed to tell the women that it was a build it yourself sushi and a lot of the women were wondering what the nori was for. Come on, they look like a bright bunch, I would have thought they would figure it out. Anyway, Danny's part of the dish which was a yuzu ginger granita, didn't sit too well with the judges. Danny stood by his dish and wouldn't budge even after the judges were hinting that if he would say, yeah your right maybe I could have done this or that, he might have been spared. But no, being stubborn earned Danny a pack your knives and go. Double D

Top Chef - Live on Today

The quick fire challenge is to make a one bite breakfast. One bite?! Bring on the bacon, bring on the eggs! One bite doesn't cut it with me, especially for breakfast. But this is not about me, so I'll continue. There were some interesting combinations like Fabio's bruleed banana and brioche (what's brioche? It looked like egg nog), Danny's cornflake crusted zucchini blossoms and Hosea's quail egg with sweet potato hash. A lot of quail gave their eggs for this challenge but it was Leah with the win for making quail egg, tomato and cheese bite. Jamie was a close second with her baby BLT but the judges said her portion was more than a bite. Picky, picky.

For the elimination challenge, the chefs have to make a 2 1/2 minute presentation for live TV. Everyone heads to the market and straight to the seafood counter for tuna. After the prep work, it was time for the presentations. Padma, Gail and Chef Tom were on hand to time the presentations and judge the food. It was hard for anyone to stay in the time limit and some of the food was less than pleasing judging by Chef Tom's reactions.

The top three that managed the time limit and had decent food were Fabio, Jeff and Ariane. They each had their dishes on the Today Show where the hosts chose the winner. After tasting Jeff's malfouf roll, Cathy Lee Gifford acted like she had been poisoned running around like she was choking then spitting out the food. I'm still trying to figure out what a malfouf is but it didn't look as bad as Ms. Gifford made it out to be. Ariane is on top once again when she wins the challenge with her tomato, feta and watermelon salad.

Now for the bottom three: Melissa made habanero shrimp which was so hot no one could eat it. My husband would have polished it off and asked for more, the man eats habanero peppers whole! Jamie made a green salad topped with a fried duck egg which was undercooked and Alex's creme brulee fell short earning him a pack your knives and go. Double D

Top Chef - A Foo Fighter Thanksgiving

For the quick fire challenge, the chefs have to redo a recipe from the Top Chef cook book. Everyone picks their dish and are off and cooking when, 10 minutes into the challenge, Padma tells the chefs that they have to make soup with the ingredients they are working with. Poor Leah was making tuna tartar, I don't think that would make a very good soup. She thought so too and came up with a white asparagus soup which won her the challenge and immunity.

The elimination challenge is to make Thanksgiving dinner for the Foo Fighters and their entourage which includes 18 vegetarians. Everyone is thinking, no big deal right? Then they find out the catch is they have to cook the dinner using one burner, microwave ovens and toaster ovens. They divide into two teams with Leah picking her dream team of all of the best chefs so far. She's no dummy! Leah's team call themselves Team Sexy Pants while the other team is Team Cougar, apparently because of Ariane who is the oldest.

Eugene from Team Cougar doesn't waste any time and rigs up a grill using a chafing dish and a grill rack from one of the toaster ovens. The other twist was that they were doing all of the cooking outside and it started raining. You see the production crew trying to put up tents while the chefs are freaking out thinking they will be serving soggy food. I would have been more worried about all those toaster ovens shorting out in the rain.

Aside from the rigged up grill, everyone made do with the micros and toaster ovens and got their meals out on time. Ariane who has been on the bottom from the start, made the turkey for the Cougar team which turned out to be a crowd fave. The Foo Fighters kept going back and forth between the two teams liking dishes from each. In the end it was the Foo Fighters love of bacon and team Sexy Pants' vegan stuffing that won them the challenge and a trip to that nights concert while team Cougar cleaned up the mess. It came down to the desserts to decide who went home and the unlucky chef that heard Padma utter the words pack your knives and go was Richard. Double D

Top Chef - All American

The quick fire this week is to create a signature hot dog and go up against Angelina who apparently is a famous hot dog vendor in NYC. Fabio has no idea how to make a hot dog but that doesn't stop him from trashing everyone else. He gets knocked down a peg when Radhika wins with her Indian inspired lamb dogs.

Keeping with the all American theme, the elimination challenge is to create a three course New American lunch menu. The chefs divide themselves into threes, appetizers, entree and dessert with everyone responsible for one dish. The frenzied shopping begins and Jill decides to buy ostrich eggs to make quiche. OK. After everyone is back and in the kitchen, Chef Tom drops the bombshell. Not only will they be serving lunch in his own restaurant but the customers will be chefs that tried out for Top Chef and didn't make the cut. No pressure there!

Back in the kitchen, Ariane is making a lemon meringue martini and wants everyone to taste it. Did anyone bother to tell her this is a competition? Does she honestly think they are going to tell her what they really think? Actually it looked like most of them were honest but she still said, "if I don't win you all are going to hear it!" There's gratitude for you!

The "customers" come in the restaurant wanting to hate everything and they pretty much succeeded. They all said how they would have done this or done that. They talk a big game but I wonder if they knew how much time the chefs had to prepare. The only dishes they liked were Jamie's corn soup, Stefan's halibut, Jeff's chicken and Carla's apple tart. Everyone hated Ariane's martini saying it was way too sweet, even Padama had to spit it out. The judge's commented they could tell Radhika had immunity when they tasted her avocado mousse, avocado mousse?! Fabio lives to trash talk another day when he wins with his beef carpasco with olives and Parmesan cheese. Ariane dodges the bullet again when Jill and her ostrich egg disaster is told to pack her knives and go. Double D

Top Chef - Premier

The talent pool for Top Chef has exceeded itself once again or so it seems. Most of the contestants own their own restaurant or are a executive chef at one. There is one student. So everyone is making friends and having a good time when Padama and Chef Tom announce the quick fire challenge. They have to peel apples with a knife. The quick fire is done in three rounds and the one left standing is going home. The second round is chopping the apples while the third round is to cook the apples. One contestant slices his thumb and bleeds all over his apples but luck for him, he peeled them good and didn't have to continue. The two bottom people both make salads. Nothing wrong with salads but come on, this is your first impression with the judges! It doesn't work for Lauren and her spinach salad gets her a ticket home with Stefan winning immunity. At the house, personalities are emerging with Stefan and Fabio thinking they are superior. Check the ego at the door guys it usually goes before the fall.

In the elimination challenge, the chefs are paired up to go head to head and get an area of NYC to get their inspiration, China Town, Little Italy, etc. It seemed like one person from every twosome didn't know how to cook in that particular area. The shopping was funny, the one person who didn't know what they were doing would follow the other to get some clue. Back in the kitchen, Jeff was running around like a chicken, well you know, and not getting anything done. Everyone else was trying to get in the swing of things since they really aren't used to competing. I thought sure Eugene was going to win since he didn't know how to cook Indian food but came up with, apparently, is their national dish of lamb with basmati rice and tzatziki with tandoori glaze (yes I cheated and looked it up). But it was not to be and Stefan wins with his lamb chop paired with beef skewers, sounds plain by comparison. Pour student, Patrick, who had so much trouble with his black rice noodles didn't impress the judges and was told to pack his knives and go. Double D

Top Design-Finale

I've been having the darnest time trying to adjust to the weather change and the time change. Yes kids, we really do have a weather change in Las Vegas. I have lived here several years and the weather immediately turns from summer into winter on Halloween night or the day after. It's really a dramatic and noticeable change. And with the time change, my sleep cycle is completely thrown off. So last night I tried to watch the Top Design finale, between bouts of eyes wide shut and eyes wide open. Top Design brought back recently booted, Andrea, who said that she shouldn't have made the choice to leave because she felt like she could have designed a whole house, well duh, you didn't give yourself a chance. Eddie, whose forced smile and unlikely pairing with his never to be my friend, Preston, was the last partner he wanted to be paired with. I wanted to slap that silly, frozen smile off Eddie's face. And Natalie. She's so bland, I almost forgot who she was. So between designing their houses and the end result, I had my eyes wide shut. I woke up just in time to see the finish products. I wasn't crazy about Ondine's 50's style house. The couches were pink, small and uncomfortable. Who watches TV on couches like that? But one of my favorite, I wish I could do that in my house item, was the square cut mirror headboard that she designed. I would love to do that in my living room. I think over all, my favorite was Preston's as a complete house. That was a house I could live in, especially the office with it's beautiful detailed moulding and the master bedroom with that heavenly canopy. Sweet dreams! I thought the dining room was elegant and tasteful. All the while, Adler while going through both Ondine's and Preston's, had that look of tasting sour milk. You could so tell that Adler's favorite designer was Nathan. I guess Adler likes rooms that can't be lived in. The dining room table was fit for breakfast only, one could never do dinner on a small square table like that and that paper plate light fixture looked like a fire hazard to me. I did like the painting, so simple-take a blank canvas and drip different streaks of paint, let dry and hang. Something DaVinci could copy. How simple is that? I think I might have to try that. Overall in the end, design outweighed function as they crowned stalker eye Nathan and give him the 100,000 grand. Hey Nathan, you looked much better when you had hair, less stalkerish and more artist designerish.-Single D

Top Design Sends Martha's Eddie Home

It must have been a sad day at the Martha household, when Eddie was sent home. I never thought Miss fancy name, plain Jane, Ondine would have out lasted Eddie, the stylist from Martha Stewart. I thought for sure he would have made it into the final two opposite stalker eye Nathan. Unfortunately, for the last two challenges, Eddie just totally flopped. In the previous challenge designing a room around a chandelier, I think Margaret Russell said that he took a stunning crystal chandelier and made it look like a dime store purchase. He drabbed it up with all that heavy Martha Stewart furniture, sorry Martha! The light fixture totally disappeared among the gold leaf leaves wall treatment. Where was the sparkle, where was the drama? Looking back at the pictures of the light rooms I really think Andrea's room was really great, better than Eddie's and Ondine's. The green room with the swanky glam furniture really did have an elegant feel. Too bad she dismissed herself and her talent.

In the semi finals, Eddie chose to do the master suite that was another ode to the drab. In the words of Eddie himself, why should I do stunning when I can just do drab? (ok something to that effect!). Where was the master in the master bedroom? It spoke Grandma slept here. I hated, hated those white lattice garden trellis. Isn't that something they would do in design 101? Both Eddie and Nathan's room lacked the pizazz, style and drama. And I hated Eddie's white lattice garden trellis, did I say that already? Nathan's room was mix of bland white bread with the quirky plain stupid mixed in, like the jar of nails. What was up with that? He said that was supposed to be sexy, yeah maybe in the world of a dominatrix or leather face from Texas Chainsaw.

I hate to admit it, but Ondine's small office room was really nice. I have always been partial to black and white, so dramatic.

In the end, I think the judges knew that they could expect the unexpected from Nathan and that was the only thing that saved him against Eddie. For Eddie, it would have been more Martha. In Eddie's defense, Margaret Russell really came to his rescue. I was thinking maybe she has some personal ties to Martha Stewart not to diss Eddie like guest judge Jeff Lewis of Flipping Out. He more like flipped out on Eddie, on what he was wearing and on what he did. He said he could so totally match who did what room by how the designers were dressed. Ok, so Eddie looked like something of a 1920's throw back, but hey, look at Jonathan Adler's sense of clothing style, it's the same as Eddie's. Well, sorry to see ya go Eddie but it's back to Martha's house with ya.-Single D

Top Design-Honorable Mentions

I don't know why I am not blogging Top Design. One of my three favorite things to do is design, cook and travel. So why not Top Design? I started watching Top Design because it followed on the sassy high heels of Project Runway. I was thinking just another knock off of HGTV Design Star and I love that show, although I thought this season was pretty lame. I think I actually like Top Design better, oh hush! A few honorable mentions here. First there's designer to Martha Stewart, in all his girlish glory, Eddie. He reminds me of the kid on the playground you would push off the slide just for kicks. He'd go running to the nearest teacher and tattle tale, nose dripping with snot and blood. And can he be more humble? The guy thinks he God's gift to simply everything, "I do it all", design, cook, stage, stumble and fall. I'm wondering what Martha's thinking when she sees her editor in chief say, gee I don't know what you mean, I'm great! Then there was Wisit. What kind of name is Wisit? He reminded me of a Chinese concubine, an operatic Madame Butterfly flitting here and flitting there, uttering rococo this and rococo that. What exactly is rococo? Next there's Nathan. Bald, sour, worm like. Sometimes the camera light accents his deep eye bag, only one though, so that he looks like some kind of weird psycho person, but my best bet for winning this whole thing. Blatant raw talent. The person I liked the best right from the beginning was Andrea, wife of Ricky Schroeder. She just seems so down to earth and ordinary. She has those sleepy bedroom eyes that seem so sweet and innocent. No effectual airs about being married to an actor and not a diva bone in her body. I think her lack of professional experience pitted against the likes of Eddie and Nathan was just too intimidating for her and she actually asked to leave the show last night. When the judges told her that she was not the one out this week and did she still want to leave the show, I think she suffered a moment of why did I open my mouth. But because she is a nice person and it would be plain jane, Ondine to leave, she knew she couldn't back down now. Too bad she didn't reign in her insecurity at least until the judging because she would have made it to the final four and be the last woman standing, which would have been a huge accomplishment on her part. Now I guess it's back to Hollywood, the kids, the Hollywood lifestyle and hiring designers, after all, I'm sure she can afford it.

One mention about the judges here. Jonathan Adler, iconic potter extraordinaire. Who has a title like that? I think might refer to myself as Single D, blogger, mother extraordinaire. Doesn't his face convey it all? He has a mother face, it gets all screwed up when he doesn't like something. You so totally know when he finds a design repulsive and for him, if it's not genius then it's repulsive. Margaret Russell looks like the b!!ch from Hell. Oh boy, would not want to meet her in a dark alley, she's just plain scary. I do like India Hicks but what is she famous for again? And that Kelly Wearstler, I know she's some kind of designer, but does that give her license to wear the quirkiest hats in the universe? My favorite Tim Gunn of this show is Todd Oldman, Oldham. He just seems so nice and has a voice that would calm down a pack of pitbulls. He so knowledgeable and gives kind words of encouragement, unlike Adler's looks of "oh my why did you do that"? -Single D

Project Runway-Finale

Well, I guess Double D was right when she read that the three to Bryant Park were girls. This would be the first time 3 ladies held that distinction even though I still can't stand Kenley being in the top three. She's still ranting on about how the judges accused her 4 times, yep, 4 times of copycatting other designers style. She acts like she doesn't know what they are talking about. Oh yes she does! That mother goose wedding gown was just too eerily similar to that McQueen wedding dress and I don't even know who McQueen is, just saw a picture of his gown. Tim suggests not to do the wedding gown thing on the runway, but Kenley spouts something about being the designer being the decider in that nasally nasty way that she has about her, wa wa! You could so tell that when Tim went on to Korto he was relieved to have cordial banter with a nice polite human being. Korto is thankfully dismantling her awful wedding gown and making two new outfits. Cut to Kenley sneering that Leanne's collection looks like Holly Hobby. Well, her collection doesn't look Holly Hobby, just Leanne. Doesn't that girl ever wash her hair. It's so stringy and limp, you'd think the TREsseme professionals would grab her, tie her down and wash that hair! Leanne meanwhile is dressing a model who brings her dog into the studio who is pooping, not fabric but doggie turds or as Jeff (my co-worker) would say making a grossen poopen. When that dog was allowed in the studio, I just knew poop or pee would fly.

At the fashion show, Heidi looked amazing as usual. Here she announces that Jennifer Lopez was to be the guest judge but hurt her foot so in her stead, Tim Gunn was to be the guest judge. Hum, a hurt foot how would that be a factor in judging the runway? Tim graciously points out that he will not let his associations with the designers cloud his judgment, meaning Kenley you're out! Kenley is the first to show and walks on stage in a Holly Hobby dress fit for a twelve year old and sprouting a display of green leaves from her head, which I'm sure is a Kenley original. I thought her collection wasn't all that bad and I did love that beige number with the hand painted flowers down one side, but once again, Michael Kors pointed out that one dress was eerily similar to another designer, more protest from Kenley ensued.

Korto next on the runway exhibiting a collection of colorful outfits which I thought were very pretty and I did like the ethnic touches. Leanne's collection of folds, pleats or as Michael Kors called them petals, were a little overdone. Why did every outfit have to have those petals, Petals Marshall? (Kors said it sounded like a stripper name). Do you know how to get your stripper name? Your pet's name when you were a child and the street that you lived on. Mine was Suzy G!

Anyway, I was so hoping that Korto would win, I mean she is older, has a family and could really design clothes for the everyday woman. How many women are going to wear those petal thingy's of Leanne's? I should be happy that Kenley didn't win, maybe she should develop a line of sailor clothes since she is in love with rope and all that. Now maybe Leanne can afford getting that haircut and a makeover.-Single D

Project Runway-And Then There Were Four

Kenley is still griping about how Leanne sabotaged her outfit on the runway. Oh come on, there's just no making a silk purse out of a cow's ear. Leanne is about as modelish as an elephant in a tutu. Not to mention that the outfit itself was so hideous. Tim takes the designers on a field trip to the New York's Botanical Gardens for their next challenge, an evening gown inspired by nature. Everyone gets a camera to snap pictures for their inspiration. I'm wondering do they get to keep the camera? I love free things! On their shopping trip to Mood, Kenley forgets her tulle, aw shucks. Back at the studio, Kenley realizes that she doesn't have her tulle. I am momentarily happy with that misfortune. Why is it during these shows, we want the divas to suffer? Jerrell and Korto are like, she's not getting mine! Well hey, this is a contest after all. I was greatly disappointed when Tim said she could go back to Mood and retrieve her lost bag. Dang! I was hoping Tim would say sorry, hollatchaboy. I pretty much thought all the dresses sucked. When Jerrell was buying his fabric at Mood, I'm like thinking those fabric pieces don't go together. The colors were awful. His dress looked like it was going to fall down off the model. Korto's dress was a total disappointment. Looked like slices of cantaloupe. Leanne's soft purple dress was the best one, but once again a stray swag of dark blue fabric was pooping out the back. Kenley again is just so over the top about her dress, thinking that it matches the photo of the flowers. Hello? Her dress resembled everything but botanical. Let see a few words come to mind, like reptilian, the shedding of snake skin, mermaid, dolphin, lobster tail name a few. When Heidi said to Kenley that it wasn't very elegant, Kenley shoots back that she wasn't going for elegant. Kenley would contradict anything anyone would say. If Heidi said it was beautiful, Kenley would say it's crap that I was going for. Come on, I wanted a cat fight! I wanted Heidi to get up out of that director's seat and slap Kenley silly. Heidi should have let loose on her. Meanwhile, Kenley feels the heat of being ostracized from the group especially when the judges asked each one who they wanted with them at Bryant Park and everyone excluded Kenley. Waaa, everyone hates me, no one loves me! Get a clue. She says that has happened all her life, well duh, maybe it's the way you come off, like your sh*t doesn't stink and holier than thou attitude! In the final analysis, the judges opted to keep the four of them with one being eliminated before Bryant Park like last year when lovable Chris March was eliminated then. It will be interesting to see Kenley's collection of I Love Lucy outfits. Well we can only hope that Jerrell, Korto and Leanne step up their game and out do the princess of conceit. -Single D

Project Runway-Grad models

Well, imagine my surprise when last night's episode, I see Suede amongst the designers. I'm like huh? According to my last post on Project Runway, which I have committed to memory, I had him aufted by the lady Heidi. So what happened? Am I exhibiting the signs of early dementia? Heaven forbid! Did I mistake's Blayne's horrible leather bounded, muslin wrapped, blue red post mortem outfit as Suede's? Donna thinks not. Did I enter some kind of twilight zone time warp? Nope not that exciting. Just plain and simple, I was falling asleep. Yes, three seconds here, five minutes there and before you know it, I have written down in my groggy handwriting what I thought was a continual stream of consciousness was in fact only the remnants of the inside of my eye lids. Here I am frantically searching the web to see who was eliminated last week, yep, Blayne! Somehow I really knew that, because in my unconscious state, I had the thought that the pairing with Stella was the kiss of death for Blayne. Somehow filtering through my sleep induce stupor I heard the words of Michael Kors saying that Suede was not that important to be talking about himself in third person and it was there that I promptly nodded off. Sorry folks!

Well, back on track and needless to say, I am not happy that Kenley is still ever present. It seems with every week, her ego gets more and more inflated. This week Tim is like, we have special guests this week. Out walks an assortment of women (to be polite) or as Leanne said, I hope we don't have to make old lady dresses. Actually no, it's outfits for their newly graduated daughters. I guess the producers really wanted your average garden variety mother daughter team. Not a beauty among them. I cracked up when Jerrell said he was wondering who was going to get the head of lettuce, in other words the mother from H--- and that was Leanne's as her mother made all sorts of complaints at the dress Leanne made. What's special about this dress, blah, blah, blah...Mostly I thought every single outfit was horrible. Obviously they can't design something for the average woman. Weren't they supposed to make them over and take them from plain Jane to super sophicate? I didn't see one make over that made me go wow. Kenley managed to turn her bleach banged daughter into a mini-me replica of Kenley. I hated that outfit, yet week after week, the judges are loving her creations, which inflates that head of hers. Korto outfit would have been better if it were longer, since the young lady had the legs of a football player, well she did! And Leanne had to make another bed jacket to go over her dress, which the judges said the dress looked better without the jacket..hint, hint!

But it was Joe with his safe over done creation of a business suit gone wrong that the judges hated and was aufed and much to my irritation, Kenley laughing like one of the mean girls at the judges scathing comments to Joe. Now was that nice? Kenley, once cool and offbeat needs to be taken down. Will someone stuff that feather barrette down her throat! Oh, snaps to Jerrell for making the only outfit that looked wearable and winning a spot in Elle mag. Hey what was that on his head, a dead crow?-Single D

Project Runway-What's Your Zodiac Sign?

This week's special guests are the rejected designers from this season, much to the sour grapes looks of the remaining designers. The challenge is to create an avant gard look from the the zodiac sign of one of the designers. Mostly it's Libra or Aquarius. No one chooses Cancer, hey, I really wanted to see a crabby patty design. For this post, I am only going to rant about the two most auful designs ever and that would be Blayne's and Kenley's. Blayne and Stella get paired up and both choose to do Libra as their sign. The sign should have been not to pair those two odd balls together. When Blayne tries to explain his design to Tim it sounded like he was talking in a foreign language, but somewhere in there the word leathea was uttered so we knew Stella was planting ideas. Kenley and Wesley are paired together and they choose to do Aquarius as their Zodiac sign. Did Wesley utter a single word during this episode? Once again another designer is so in love with their own creation. Kenley's is enamoured of her design thinking it so avant gard, when it is more like a costume for the the Princess of lollipop land, fly away with me Peter Pan! That outfit literally looked like it could take off or were those egg pods on the shoulders housing some grotesque creature? I'm wondering how that hideous designed translated into Aquarius? Where was the illusion of water? This is the dawning of the Age of Aquarius.... Poor Tim said it was looking very Glenda the Good Witch.

The designer's models will be wearing their outfits at a party hosted at the Planetarium at the American Museum of Natural History where the past designers will pick the winning outfit. I'm wondering how they could even see the outfits in that ambient light? So fierce Christian was there, he makes me laugh just looking at him, such an elf! Back at the studio the designers get to finish their outfits with Stella still carrying on with her hammer.

At the runway show, Blayne's model just looked horrible in that outfit and as Michael Kors said, she's pooping fabric. It looked like a birthday party gone wrong. Little manic children ripped at that dress in protest! The judges were not too kind to Kenley much to her irritation. She so had that look of what are they talking about? My design is amazing! Yeah maybe in some Tim Burton scary Over the Rainbow movie. My favorite outfit was Joe's with his fiery Aries, but the winner was Jerrell with his interpretation of Sagittarius. Huh? I just didn't get it. This time, it will be two designers that get aufed and it's Terri, who has terrible anger issues and can't get along with anyone and Blayne, because one can only poop so much fabric. And oh by the way, snaps for Heidi getting an Emmy nod for hosting a reality show, but how hard can it be? Look pretty and say auf wiedershen?-Single D

Project Runway-March of the Drag Queens

I guess if anyone can dress up for a good laugh it is Chris March, last season's softie that we love so much and drag queen designer himself, all decked out in a grotesque Brunhilda like, disco bra bearing, take me to your Attila of the Hun drag queen outfit. This challenge will be to design an over the top outfit for your lovable drag queen next door and with that a parade to rival Beach Blanket Babylon, the girls come strutting in their stuff. I have never seen so much sequins and pancake makeup in one episode. I loved some of their stage names, like Farrah Moans, Hedda Lettuce, Anniad Greenkard and Sharon Needles to name a few. Each of the designers pick their models, poor Dom Stella, I thought she should have been paired with Sharon Needles, they both looked like they could chew on heroin needles for a snack. After the designers pick their models, Chris his work done here, says he needs some German food and Heidi says how about some beer and pretzels? Cute.

Oh by the way, my bad, I thought Blayne had been eliminated last challenge, wishful thinking here, but I must have dreamt that, either that, or I'm really getting those senior moments that are lasting more than a moment! Gads! Blayne is getting on everyone's nerves with is licious, this and licious that, which reminds me of my sister-in-law who used to describe herself as lusiciouslicious. Annoyinglicious, girlicious, bootylicious....shut the h---up! Keith is doing another outfit with strips, didn't he already do that? And poor Suede, his choice of Hedda Lettuce, little did he know he was picking Mommy Dearest! Hedda complains to Suede what you made gloves, were you too lazy to make sleeves? Oh Hello! I think gloves are much more time consuming to make than sleeves, what with fingers and all that? Hedda Lettuce is more like Sour Cabbage to me and certainly not Butter Lettuce. When the guys come in for their fitting, hey they really are guys. Someone said that under all that makeup was some little Mexican guy. Now I know why those guys are drag queens, they look so much better in pancake and sequins.

My favorite over the top drag queen outfit was Terri's. A mix of Kabuki meets Kiss outfit. Terri certainly thought that she was going to win the challenge, but when the judges declared Joe's sedate pink Ann Margaret, I work at a gas station jumper as the winner, Terri had that look of I was robbed, I was robbed! And rightfully so!

It was goodbye to Daniel, I take back everything I said previously about him. Gifted he maybe, but stubborn and it's my way or the highway, well, honey, it's the highway for you!-Single D

The beginning of this episode shows the designers getting out of bed and the camera catches Stella in the hall way. How many ways can you say SCARY?! I was really surprised that she wasn't wearing a leather nightie. With that out of the way, we are greeted by last season's Chris M, or who I like to call a young Fred Flintstone, dressed in a whacked out viking outfit. He looked like he had disco balls for boobs. The challenge this week is to design for drag queens. These queens had attitude for a mile. I was cracking up most of the episode but some of these people were just over the top rude, like Hedda as Single D describes above.

Everyone is SO tired of Blayne and his liciousness. Even LeeAnn said she is getting barflicious listening to him. Suede actually referred to himself as me. Don't deny it, I heard it! Kieth has gone fringe happy again and promised Tim Gunn that he was going to shape and form fit the fringes. Blayne seemed surprised when his model came in and it was a man.

Joe's outfit was too Elvis so he lowered the collar and went sailorlicious (sorry). I agree with Single D, Terri's outfit was great. My fave was Korto's red "flame" dress, her model loved it and it was exactly what the drag queen ordered.

RuPaul was the guest judge. I didn't know he was still around. I remember watching his show, as brief as it was. The judges thought Kieth's fringe disaster was messy and Jerell's dress was too normal looking. Daniel's dress was pretty but not what the challenge was about. Poor Daniel, he looked so confused and frustrated, he obviously doesn't grasp the whole drag queen concept. Joe wins with his pink sailor suit and Daniel is auf'ed. I thought Kieth should have gone home but he lives to fringe another day. Double D