Project Runway-Finale

Well, I guess Double D was right when she read that the three to Bryant Park were girls. This would be the first time 3 ladies held that distinction even though I still can't stand Kenley being in the top three. She's still ranting on about how the judges accused her 4 times, yep, 4 times of copycatting other designers style. She acts like she doesn't know what they are talking about. Oh yes she does! That mother goose wedding gown was just too eerily similar to that McQueen wedding dress and I don't even know who McQueen is, just saw a picture of his gown. Tim suggests not to do the wedding gown thing on the runway, but Kenley spouts something about being the designer being the decider in that nasally nasty way that she has about her, wa wa! You could so tell that when Tim went on to Korto he was relieved to have cordial banter with a nice polite human being. Korto is thankfully dismantling her awful wedding gown and making two new outfits. Cut to Kenley sneering that Leanne's collection looks like Holly Hobby. Well, her collection doesn't look Holly Hobby, just Leanne. Doesn't that girl ever wash her hair. It's so stringy and limp, you'd think the TREsseme professionals would grab her, tie her down and wash that hair! Leanne meanwhile is dressing a model who brings her dog into the studio who is pooping, not fabric but doggie turds or as Jeff (my co-worker) would say making a grossen poopen. When that dog was allowed in the studio, I just knew poop or pee would fly.

At the fashion show, Heidi looked amazing as usual. Here she announces that Jennifer Lopez was to be the guest judge but hurt her foot so in her stead, Tim Gunn was to be the guest judge. Hum, a hurt foot how would that be a factor in judging the runway? Tim graciously points out that he will not let his associations with the designers cloud his judgment, meaning Kenley you're out! Kenley is the first to show and walks on stage in a Holly Hobby dress fit for a twelve year old and sprouting a display of green leaves from her head, which I'm sure is a Kenley original. I thought her collection wasn't all that bad and I did love that beige number with the hand painted flowers down one side, but once again, Michael Kors pointed out that one dress was eerily similar to another designer, more protest from Kenley ensued.

Korto next on the runway exhibiting a collection of colorful outfits which I thought were very pretty and I did like the ethnic touches. Leanne's collection of folds, pleats or as Michael Kors called them petals, were a little overdone. Why did every outfit have to have those petals, Petals Marshall? (Kors said it sounded like a stripper name). Do you know how to get your stripper name? Your pet's name when you were a child and the street that you lived on. Mine was Suzy G!

Anyway, I was so hoping that Korto would win, I mean she is older, has a family and could really design clothes for the everyday woman. How many women are going to wear those petal thingy's of Leanne's? I should be happy that Kenley didn't win, maybe she should develop a line of sailor clothes since she is in love with rope and all that. Now maybe Leanne can afford getting that haircut and a makeover.-Single D

Project Runway-My Gawd-Is Kenley Still There?

I had this recurring dream er more like a nightmare. I'm watching Project Runway and thinking with every episode that Kenley is eliminated only to find her at the runway show with Heidi exclaiming that some feathery thing she concocted was crazy good. Oh my God! Was that for real?! Yep it was little doggie. She's still there with her spanky attitude in check (spanky is Korto's word for her). One hitch to progressing on to Bryant Park is to create a wedding gown and bridesmaid dress for the elimination round. $8,000 dollars and a month later we find the designers at home when Tim comes to call. Can you imagine that Korto lives in Arkansas? Poor thing. And what perfect place should we find Leanne at? Why Oregon of course. I just knew she had to be some sort of borderline tree hugging girl of nature, which she says her inspiration was the waves on the ocean. Seems nice, but must every garment have those same pleats? Didn't her boyfriend look like some sort of nerdy English professor? And of course Kenley would be where else, Brooklyn. When Tim made the stop at Jerrell's to see his collection, I thought he was stopping at a costume shop. What was up with all this glitter and trashy glam? I knew right there Jerrell was not going to make it. I did feel bad since his mama has so much faith in him.

When the designers come back to NY, I loved the cool reception that Kenley got. Everyone before were like hugging and kissing after not seeing each other for a month, but when Kenley entered a cold frosty wind swept through. I think Jerrell was the only one to say hi. Things did melt a bit after Kenley apologized, but that still doesn't make me feel all warm and fuzzy. I totally hate to admit it, but I did like her swan hatching from an egg wedding dress even if it looked like a copy of some other designer and if she did plagiarize, shouldn't she be packing her bags? Her little navy bridesmaid dress was too cute and I just hate saying that! By far the best wedding dress was Leanne's. It was a dreamy concoction of layered folds of clouds of whipped cream. I think the contest will be between Kenley and Leanne. Some of Korto's outfits have missed the mark especially her wedding dress which was more like Oscar gown gone wrong. And Jerrell's sloppy Cinderella flower pot dress was just two words-God Auful! And with that Jerrell was aufed! Hey does Jerrell still get to show at Bryant Park since there are pictures of him and his collection on Bravo? -Single D

Project Runway-And Then There Were Four

Kenley is still griping about how Leanne sabotaged her outfit on the runway. Oh come on, there's just no making a silk purse out of a cow's ear. Leanne is about as modelish as an elephant in a tutu. Not to mention that the outfit itself was so hideous. Tim takes the designers on a field trip to the New York's Botanical Gardens for their next challenge, an evening gown inspired by nature. Everyone gets a camera to snap pictures for their inspiration. I'm wondering do they get to keep the camera? I love free things! On their shopping trip to Mood, Kenley forgets her tulle, aw shucks. Back at the studio, Kenley realizes that she doesn't have her tulle. I am momentarily happy with that misfortune. Why is it during these shows, we want the divas to suffer? Jerrell and Korto are like, she's not getting mine! Well hey, this is a contest after all. I was greatly disappointed when Tim said she could go back to Mood and retrieve her lost bag. Dang! I was hoping Tim would say sorry, hollatchaboy. I pretty much thought all the dresses sucked. When Jerrell was buying his fabric at Mood, I'm like thinking those fabric pieces don't go together. The colors were awful. His dress looked like it was going to fall down off the model. Korto's dress was a total disappointment. Looked like slices of cantaloupe. Leanne's soft purple dress was the best one, but once again a stray swag of dark blue fabric was pooping out the back. Kenley again is just so over the top about her dress, thinking that it matches the photo of the flowers. Hello? Her dress resembled everything but botanical. Let see a few words come to mind, like reptilian, the shedding of snake skin, mermaid, dolphin, lobster tail name a few. When Heidi said to Kenley that it wasn't very elegant, Kenley shoots back that she wasn't going for elegant. Kenley would contradict anything anyone would say. If Heidi said it was beautiful, Kenley would say it's crap that I was going for. Come on, I wanted a cat fight! I wanted Heidi to get up out of that director's seat and slap Kenley silly. Heidi should have let loose on her. Meanwhile, Kenley feels the heat of being ostracized from the group especially when the judges asked each one who they wanted with them at Bryant Park and everyone excluded Kenley. Waaa, everyone hates me, no one loves me! Get a clue. She says that has happened all her life, well duh, maybe it's the way you come off, like your sh*t doesn't stink and holier than thou attitude! In the final analysis, the judges opted to keep the four of them with one being eliminated before Bryant Park like last year when lovable Chris March was eliminated then. It will be interesting to see Kenley's collection of I Love Lucy outfits. Well we can only hope that Jerrell, Korto and Leanne step up their game and out do the princess of conceit. -Single D

Project Runway-Musically Inspired

Leanne's stealing of Jerrell's model was all in vain, as the models this week were the designers themselves. They have to design an outfit to for a specific musical genre. Kenley of all persons has to do hip hop, which she blatantly shows us she knows nothing about. But there's no telling Kenley that she doesn't know thing one about hip hop. The girl is always right and brilliant at least in her own mind. She's like I'm going to design high waisted jeans, picks up a floral fabric for the top and a tiny leather jacket. Ok to me that screamed 80's! When Tim came in and told Kenley he wasn't understanding her outfit, she practically told him that he didn't know what he was talking about, because she knows way more about hip hop than he does. I'm sure the exchange between Tim and Kenley was much longer, because finally Tim tells Kenley that he doesn't appreciate her sarcasm! This must have been the first time in PR history that we got to see the ever elegant Tim Gunn on the brink of losing his temper. Go Tim! It was so bad, that the voting text on the commercial was do you think Kenley was mean to Tim! Well, yeah! Will someone hit her over her Lucy Ricardo, I'm stuck in the 50's head!

Korto, on the other hand, was not having any of it and the entire time looked like she would rather have a root canal than design a punk star outfit. I think she just didn't want to create an outfit for one of her own competitors, in this case Suede, which was perfect in my opinion. She did manage to pull out of her own funk after trying on the outfit that Leanne was making for her to channel the country music diva, Dolly Parton. Korto's moment of brilliance was splashing bleach over those jeans which really spoke to the punker fashion, a little over wrought, but nonetheless, ended up winning her the judges favorite.

Suede's rocker dude outfit was too tame for the judges and they said that it just looked like the everyday Jerrell. I'm wondering why does Jerrell dress like an orphaned street urchin? Jerrell did brilliantly to create 50's Kenley into a brunette Kenley Spears with his rhinestone fishnet mini dress. Maybe Kenley Spears seduced the guest judge LL Cool J in voting to keep her over sad Suede and his ever bright rainbow hair.

In the end, I'm sure we were all hoping that the ego inflated Kenley would get das boot, but once again, PR decided to keep the diva and toss the designer, in this case Suede to the curb. Maybe Suede should have defended himself up a blue streak, instead of looking like a sad Boy George's chubby cousin. In the end, Kenley's red mommy dearest lipstick mouth survives another round. Does she deserve to go to Bryant Park, heck no! But Spolier here by Double D, she said they refer to the Bryant Park fashion show as the girls from Project Runway, does this mean the only man standing Jerrell gets the auf next week and Kenley stays? Was that why all the tears on next week's preview was all about? Heavens!-Single D

Project Runway-Grad models

Well, imagine my surprise when last night's episode, I see Suede amongst the designers. I'm like huh? According to my last post on Project Runway, which I have committed to memory, I had him aufted by the lady Heidi. So what happened? Am I exhibiting the signs of early dementia? Heaven forbid! Did I mistake's Blayne's horrible leather bounded, muslin wrapped, blue red post mortem outfit as Suede's? Donna thinks not. Did I enter some kind of twilight zone time warp? Nope not that exciting. Just plain and simple, I was falling asleep. Yes, three seconds here, five minutes there and before you know it, I have written down in my groggy handwriting what I thought was a continual stream of consciousness was in fact only the remnants of the inside of my eye lids. Here I am frantically searching the web to see who was eliminated last week, yep, Blayne! Somehow I really knew that, because in my unconscious state, I had the thought that the pairing with Stella was the kiss of death for Blayne. Somehow filtering through my sleep induce stupor I heard the words of Michael Kors saying that Suede was not that important to be talking about himself in third person and it was there that I promptly nodded off. Sorry folks!

Well, back on track and needless to say, I am not happy that Kenley is still ever present. It seems with every week, her ego gets more and more inflated. This week Tim is like, we have special guests this week. Out walks an assortment of women (to be polite) or as Leanne said, I hope we don't have to make old lady dresses. Actually no, it's outfits for their newly graduated daughters. I guess the producers really wanted your average garden variety mother daughter team. Not a beauty among them. I cracked up when Jerrell said he was wondering who was going to get the head of lettuce, in other words the mother from H--- and that was Leanne's as her mother made all sorts of complaints at the dress Leanne made. What's special about this dress, blah, blah, blah...Mostly I thought every single outfit was horrible. Obviously they can't design something for the average woman. Weren't they supposed to make them over and take them from plain Jane to super sophicate? I didn't see one make over that made me go wow. Kenley managed to turn her bleach banged daughter into a mini-me replica of Kenley. I hated that outfit, yet week after week, the judges are loving her creations, which inflates that head of hers. Korto outfit would have been better if it were longer, since the young lady had the legs of a football player, well she did! And Leanne had to make another bed jacket to go over her dress, which the judges said the dress looked better without the jacket..hint, hint!

But it was Joe with his safe over done creation of a business suit gone wrong that the judges hated and was aufed and much to my irritation, Kenley laughing like one of the mean girls at the judges scathing comments to Joe. Now was that nice? Kenley, once cool and offbeat needs to be taken down. Will someone stuff that feather barrette down her throat! Oh, snaps to Jerrell for making the only outfit that looked wearable and winning a spot in Elle mag. Hey what was that on his head, a dead crow?-Single D

Project Runway-What's Your Zodiac Sign?

This week's special guests are the rejected designers from this season, much to the sour grapes looks of the remaining designers. The challenge is to create an avant gard look from the the zodiac sign of one of the designers. Mostly it's Libra or Aquarius. No one chooses Cancer, hey, I really wanted to see a crabby patty design. For this post, I am only going to rant about the two most auful designs ever and that would be Blayne's and Kenley's. Blayne and Stella get paired up and both choose to do Libra as their sign. The sign should have been not to pair those two odd balls together. When Blayne tries to explain his design to Tim it sounded like he was talking in a foreign language, but somewhere in there the word leathea was uttered so we knew Stella was planting ideas. Kenley and Wesley are paired together and they choose to do Aquarius as their Zodiac sign. Did Wesley utter a single word during this episode? Once again another designer is so in love with their own creation. Kenley's is enamoured of her design thinking it so avant gard, when it is more like a costume for the the Princess of lollipop land, fly away with me Peter Pan! That outfit literally looked like it could take off or were those egg pods on the shoulders housing some grotesque creature? I'm wondering how that hideous designed translated into Aquarius? Where was the illusion of water? This is the dawning of the Age of Aquarius.... Poor Tim said it was looking very Glenda the Good Witch.

The designer's models will be wearing their outfits at a party hosted at the Planetarium at the American Museum of Natural History where the past designers will pick the winning outfit. I'm wondering how they could even see the outfits in that ambient light? So fierce Christian was there, he makes me laugh just looking at him, such an elf! Back at the studio the designers get to finish their outfits with Stella still carrying on with her hammer.

At the runway show, Blayne's model just looked horrible in that outfit and as Michael Kors said, she's pooping fabric. It looked like a birthday party gone wrong. Little manic children ripped at that dress in protest! The judges were not too kind to Kenley much to her irritation. She so had that look of what are they talking about? My design is amazing! Yeah maybe in some Tim Burton scary Over the Rainbow movie. My favorite outfit was Joe's with his fiery Aries, but the winner was Jerrell with his interpretation of Sagittarius. Huh? I just didn't get it. This time, it will be two designers that get aufed and it's Terri, who has terrible anger issues and can't get along with anyone and Blayne, because one can only poop so much fabric. And oh by the way, snaps for Heidi getting an Emmy nod for hosting a reality show, but how hard can it be? Look pretty and say auf wiedershen?-Single D

Project Runway-Diane Von Furstenberg-Need I Say More?

Again I miss the first fifteen minutes of this episode, I really need to brush my teeth earlier! I came into the episode where Stella is saying that can she make something Diane would like? Now's the time to do something pretty Stella, not during the car challenge! When she said Diane, I knew it was Von Furstenberg, who else? Everyone was saying something about a Shanghai to Berlin story which to me sounded like a sound bite from some Indy movie or like some catalog description out of that Peterman catalog, you know the one where there is great intrigue surrounding a trench coat, which always made me want to buy it. Joe is inspired by Shanghai and is doing something of a Shanghai top with an open back. I was wondering why just a top, couldn't he done a full on Mandarin dress like that? Korto is loving her yellow fabric peeking through her dress which Tim says, it looks like bra straps. Me, I'm loving the yellow to with that striped material which screams Von Furstenberg! Meanwhile, Stella gets the story wrong and ends up in a wrong country, probably a country where they all wear leather. The winner of this challenge will get to sell their design to American Express cardholders online under the Diane label. This perplexes me, why only American Express? Doesn't sound like a wide audience. Kenley is so excited, like I've only sold to Walmart and Kmart, duh. And what was Kenley wearing during the runway show, purple ostrich shoulder pads?

Joe was so loving his outfit, if he could have kiss his ass he would have. I guess love is blind, because that outfit was auful! Blayne did knickers again and identifies with Diane, she's into tanning too! The judges hated Stella's Dracula Cape and Michael Kors said her crotch on the pants looked like there was something missing. Hey Michael, it's a girl for heaven's sake!

I just didn't get Suede's Berlin inspired outfit. What was Berlin about it, the vest made of tweed? Isn't that more British? Michael Kors said it looked like the model got dressed in the dark-ouch! Leanne wins this challenge with her midnight blue evening dress and that I stole my grammie bed jacket. I'm wondering how many orders she'll get for that? Poor Stella was aufed by the judges because she really can't do pretty. Best left designing rocker outfits and biker chics. -Single D

When the designers are told they will be designing for a fashion icon Blayne hopefully asks Mary Kate Olsen (?!) I think the tanning booth has fried a few too many of his brain cells. No Blayne, it's Diane Von Furstenberg and we're going to Shanghai! I was starting to wonder if Kenley was ever going to stop crying. Apparently Ms. VF is her idol and she couldn't believe she was going to meet her let alone design for the woman. Then they are told they get to chose their fabrics from Diane's own fabric room and that started Kenley bawling all over again. Get a grip girl!

I'm having terrible writer's block this week so I'll suffice by saying Joe's outfit was God awful, Stella tried but apparently didn't get the whole Shanghai thing. My fave was Kenley's dress and I really think she would have won if she had paired it with a jacket. I wasn't digging Blayne's knickers or Jarell's whatever you want to call it. I really liked LeAnn's dress but not the jacket. That said, Stella gets auf'ed and congrats go to LeAnn! Hopefully I'll find my muse, or at least an idol, and be better next week! Double D

Project Runway-Fashion Driven

I come down after missing 5 minutes of this episode to find the designers tearing apart cars for materials. Ripping seat belts and smashing headlights. Gee what a waste of good cars. I felt the pain, since I do have a Saturn Vue which by the way I love, except that the air conditioner is not all that great for Las Vegas. Dominatrix Stella's like, "I don't want to do leathea this time, I want to do something beautiful!" Hey Stella, wrong challenge for beautiful! Can one find beauty in a air filter skirt? Kenley can. She made a very inventive outfit out of air filters in which she hand painted the pleats to look like zebra stripes. It would have work had it not looked so stiff to walk in. The model looked pained and if a big gust of wind rushed in she would have been rolling down main street. Terri had a little bit of a hysterical laughing fit at the expense of Korto's Jeepers Creepers kimono jacket of seat belts, which sends Terri into peals of laughter on the floor, to which Jerrell remarks that Terri has two faces and 4 patterns, meow! Ok designers we're getting giddy! For the runway, Korto is dressed up in her best African princess cocktail dress and her seat belt jacket did turn out incredible, which guest judge Rachel Zoe coos that she would wear that. Who the H is Rachel? Keith tells his poor model not to sit because that would rip the seams. His outfit is so poorly designed that if she sneezed it would rip. Keith is determined not to do a fringy, sticky note fabric outfit again which sends him into a fringe withdrawal and he does something he's never done before, he created a normal, plain, off to the office outfit. I really thought that the judges were going to eliminate Stella for her mismatched outfit. It was like Stella made a top and then got tired so she decided to wrap the seat belts around her model in a ring around the rosy move. That was ghastly and the judges said that the two pieces didn't go together, but instead they decided that they had had enough of Utah boy complaining that his creativity was stifled and aufted poor Keith. Well Keith, it's back to Utah for you-now go cut up some more fabric! LeAnna was judges favorite with her frayed seat belt trim and her I have room for my cellulite skirt. -Single D

This week, Hiedi gives the designers an address and tells them to go to the rooftop where Tim Gunn is waiting with the color designer for Saturn along with Saturn vehicles. The challenge is to make an outfit out of materials used to make cars.

Kieth is coping an attitude thinking he is all that. He sends his model off to hair and makeup with instructions not to sit down. Who gets their hair done while standing up? His model tears the skirt anyway which pisses off Kieth. Just put some fringe over it! Stella didn't do her normal leather thing, which I found kind of odd since the interior of a car could be mostly leather. She did say that it won't happen again. Just as well, her outfit was mismatched. Her model looked like one of those tops that you pull the string to make spin.

Most of the outfits were nice, I especially liked Kenley's air filter dress and Korto's coat dress. Kieth showed us all that he can't take criticism and that he is still stewing over the messy chicken dress comment. Oh, grow up! He can't pull off the simple dress look and blames the judges for making him make that decision not to do his normal stuff. The judges are tired of his attitude and is auf'ed. So it's back to Utah and obscurity with Kieth and LeeAnn wins with her car seat hip dress. I wonder if it has that new car smell. Double D

Project Runway-March of the Drag Queens

I guess if anyone can dress up for a good laugh it is Chris March, last season's softie that we love so much and drag queen designer himself, all decked out in a grotesque Brunhilda like, disco bra bearing, take me to your Attila of the Hun drag queen outfit. This challenge will be to design an over the top outfit for your lovable drag queen next door and with that a parade to rival Beach Blanket Babylon, the girls come strutting in their stuff. I have never seen so much sequins and pancake makeup in one episode. I loved some of their stage names, like Farrah Moans, Hedda Lettuce, Anniad Greenkard and Sharon Needles to name a few. Each of the designers pick their models, poor Dom Stella, I thought she should have been paired with Sharon Needles, they both looked like they could chew on heroin needles for a snack. After the designers pick their models, Chris his work done here, says he needs some German food and Heidi says how about some beer and pretzels? Cute.

Oh by the way, my bad, I thought Blayne had been eliminated last challenge, wishful thinking here, but I must have dreamt that, either that, or I'm really getting those senior moments that are lasting more than a moment! Gads! Blayne is getting on everyone's nerves with is licious, this and licious that, which reminds me of my sister-in-law who used to describe herself as lusiciouslicious. Annoyinglicious, girlicious, bootylicious....shut the h---up! Keith is doing another outfit with strips, didn't he already do that? And poor Suede, his choice of Hedda Lettuce, little did he know he was picking Mommy Dearest! Hedda complains to Suede what you made gloves, were you too lazy to make sleeves? Oh Hello! I think gloves are much more time consuming to make than sleeves, what with fingers and all that? Hedda Lettuce is more like Sour Cabbage to me and certainly not Butter Lettuce. When the guys come in for their fitting, hey they really are guys. Someone said that under all that makeup was some little Mexican guy. Now I know why those guys are drag queens, they look so much better in pancake and sequins.

My favorite over the top drag queen outfit was Terri's. A mix of Kabuki meets Kiss outfit. Terri certainly thought that she was going to win the challenge, but when the judges declared Joe's sedate pink Ann Margaret, I work at a gas station jumper as the winner, Terri had that look of I was robbed, I was robbed! And rightfully so!

It was goodbye to Daniel, I take back everything I said previously about him. Gifted he maybe, but stubborn and it's my way or the highway, well, honey, it's the highway for you!-Single D

The beginning of this episode shows the designers getting out of bed and the camera catches Stella in the hall way. How many ways can you say SCARY?! I was really surprised that she wasn't wearing a leather nightie. With that out of the way, we are greeted by last season's Chris M, or who I like to call a young Fred Flintstone, dressed in a whacked out viking outfit. He looked like he had disco balls for boobs. The challenge this week is to design for drag queens. These queens had attitude for a mile. I was cracking up most of the episode but some of these people were just over the top rude, like Hedda as Single D describes above.

Everyone is SO tired of Blayne and his liciousness. Even LeeAnn said she is getting barflicious listening to him. Suede actually referred to himself as me. Don't deny it, I heard it! Kieth has gone fringe happy again and promised Tim Gunn that he was going to shape and form fit the fringes. Blayne seemed surprised when his model came in and it was a man.

Joe's outfit was too Elvis so he lowered the collar and went sailorlicious (sorry). I agree with Single D, Terri's outfit was great. My fave was Korto's red "flame" dress, her model loved it and it was exactly what the drag queen ordered.

RuPaul was the guest judge. I didn't know he was still around. I remember watching his show, as brief as it was. The judges thought Kieth's fringe disaster was messy and Jerell's dress was too normal looking. Daniel's dress was pretty but not what the challenge was about. Poor Daniel, he looked so confused and frustrated, he obviously doesn't grasp the whole drag queen concept. Joe wins with his pink sailor suit and Daniel is auf'ed. I thought Kieth should have gone home but he lives to fringe another day. Double D

Project Runway-Lipstick Jungle

Ok, I've been on vacation to Lake Tahoe and much to my dismay, there was no Bravo Channel there! Hey what's up with that? They had Oxygen, they had Lifetime, they had HGTV, but no Bravo! And another thing, I wish all the channels would be the same whether you're in Podunk, Iowa or New York City. ABC would be channel 13 and Sci Fi would be 45, Bravo 53. Why does it have to be different in every city? I had to watch the 600 some channels scroll around until I found the channels I wanted to watch. Anyway, thankfully, I had taped last weeks episode and got to see that cutie, Apolo Ono on the show. This week it's an outfit for Brooke Shields to wear in Lipstick Jungle. I've never seen it, but I just might have to since I love Andrew McCarthy, remember him from "Pretty in Pink"? He always seems to have that same look on his face, but I love him anyway. Designers will be working in teams of two. Brooke picks 6 of the best designs. I had to laugh when Tim announced Brooke Shields, Stella was like who? When Stella presented her design to Brooke which was a typical Stella outfit, Brooke tells Stella, yes, but I have to work in it. Stella's like, duh work? Luckily for her, Jerrell picks her to work on his team, since he is doing some leatha work, so Stella's in happy hammer heaven. Korto and Joe's outfit shouts, Sabu, where's my elephant! Or in Tim's words, giant sweet potato. Korto has that I don't care attitude, since she has immunity and it would be poor Joe's head if they're in the bottom, she bites! Blayne's knickers looks like something you would wear for boating or crabbing. What was he thinking? Must be the lack of tanning that is draining his creativity like Superman and kryptonite. Daniel and Kelli's outfit, one word slutty, slutty, slutty, oh that's three words (to quote Michael Kors). Daniel says he has taste which sends Kenley into fits of laughter. My favorite design was surprisingly Jerrell and Stella's, but Brooke didn't care for that big belted thing in the middle, don't those ladies of Sex in the City like those? And hey, what was up with Jerrell's outfit during the runway show? It looked like he stole his mammie's moo moo. You could so tell that Brooke liked Keith and Kelli's outfit. This time Keith's infamous post it notes worked because they were brown. Single D

It was team time at Project Runway to design for Brooke Shields. All they were told is that they would be designing for a successful business woman. Everyone was guessing from Oprah to Hillary Clinton. Most seemed pretty happy with Ms. Brooke.

Brooke judges the sketches and when she gets to Stella, who has made her predictable leather corset, Brooke reminds her that it has to be worn to work. Stella just looks at her like, what's the problem? The woman just doesn't get it.

Terri was hating the shirt Suede made until Tim Gunn came in and said he loved it and all of a sudden Terri loved it too! Blayne's shorts were just plain ugly and looked uncomfortable in the nether regions. I loved Jerell and Stella's dress. Kelly's dress didn't look anything like her sketch and came out, as Michael Kors said, slutty.

I liked Keith's dress, his thing for fringe worked this time. Brooke announced Keith as the winner and Jerell wasn't real happy about that, he even did a little z snap thaing with his head. Kelly and her slutty dress were auf'ed. Double D

Project Runway-Night on the Town

Suede loves Tia (his model), Donna's tired of Suede, Suede's still talking in third person. Heidi says that the designers deserve a night on the town. Don't get excited girls that means work! Tim walks in with ponchos and rain boots (cause it's raining outside) for a ride on a double decker bus where they are told they will be taking pictures of NY at night for inspiration for their next challenge, to design something inspired by NY for a night on the town. Dominatrix Stella, whose a native New Yorker, (is she from the Bronx?) gives the ride a leather thumbs up, she doesn't do tourist. All Blayne wants to do is get dolled up and get a tan. Keith is running around NY like a kid in a candy store, Keith says it so hard being gay in Salt Lake City, ya think? Back at the studio Kenley tells us that her design style is the modern day calendar girl, no wonder she looks like Betty Crocker and Leanne is afraid that she will be too creative. What?! Girl you were in the bottom two for the last two challenges, what does that say? Meanwhile, Dom Stella is in lea-tha heaven hammering grommets into her fabric which has all the other designers wanting to hammer her over the head. Hey doesn't Stella look like she could be Cher's cousin or something? Sorry Cher! That accent is driving me crazy! When Tim gets ready to leave, Blayne's like "Holla at cha boy!" which Tim doesn't understand. Ok, I'm old school, to me that's bronx for lady control your kid!

On the runway, Keith's outfit looked like something made of post it notes. Or as Michael Kors said toilet paper caught in a windstorm, ouch! Shy Jennifer designed sleepwear with piano key sleeves. Kenley's dress reminded me of an Easter basket, which I thought was the worst but ended up winning the challenge. Stella, her idea of dressing up for a night on the town is dressing down in lea-tha. Emily and Blayne were making a fashion line for the Carmen Miranda festival with all that cha cha on their dresses, but it was Emily's whose cha cha was draped unflattering across the bosom that was aufed by a very leopardy looking Heidi Klum. -Single D

For a good laugh see: http://www.thebestpageintheuniverse.net/c.cgi?u=fashion

A bus tour at night in the rain. I don't think that's what the group thought when they were told they were going out for a night on the town. I think Blayne was the most disappointed since he was looking forward to getting "all dolled up". They are to take photos for inspiration to make an outfit for an evening out. Everyone starts taking pictures except for Stella who can't figure out how to use her camera. Does it matter? All she is going to do is make some rocked out leather thing. I don't even remember what her inspirational picture was come to think of it. After their "night out" the group gets ready for bed and Jarrel comes out of the bathroom (he's already out of the closet) looking like a mime gone bad with his face mask.

Everyone gets their fabric and gets to work. Keith's dress looks like exactly what it is, little pieces of fabric sewed together. I made something like that for one of my Barbie dolls way back when, but mine was made from Kleenex. Same thing. OK, Suede needs to stop talking about himself in third person. Double D doesn't like it!

When it came time to fit the models, Daniel was having a bit of a problem and he has to tell his model to lift up her boob. I hope he doesn't try to prop it up somehow! Joe's dress was really stylin' but Leanne's dress was by far my fave, too cute! I think she should have been the winner but Kenley wins with her bold print fabric and tulle insert. I didn't like it but who am I? I really thought Jennifer's matronly black dress would earn her a big Auff but it was Emily's little black dress with exploded corsage that gets auf'ed. Double D

Project Runway-Suede Seduction

This time the challenge is to make a cocktail dress, but wait, don't whoop it up too much, cause you know there is always a twist. Yes girls, your models will be doing the shopping and buying fabric. They will have to buy "green" fabrics. Yes dearies, environmentally friendly. I guess there's tons of stuff they do with recycled plastics?? Dominatrix is afraid that her model will buy the wrong fabric, hey Stella, anything is a step up from the garbage bags from last week! Three models buy some shiny brown fabric to the horror of their designers. Stella's like, my model wants elegance and class, which she doesn't do. She does urban (in other words, scary and raunchy!). Suede, we discover has the third person syndrome, talking about himself in third person. You remember Elaine from Seinfeld when she fell for that guy at the gym who kept talking to her about him in third person, Timmy would like to go out with Elaine, Tim likes Elaine. Suede's outfit looked like some kind of rag rug with crazy bits of striped fabric sewn together. Stella has the, I only want to work in leather syndrome. Someone calls her leatherface, wasn't he the serial killer in Texas Chainsaw Massacre? When Tim comes in, he takes a look at Korto's outfit with her exposed seams and he thinks it inside out, which she tells him it's not. Tim does manage to keep that look of bewilderment under control. I would have been like, what are you crazy? On the runway, Michael Kors said it looked like the dress had butt wings! Nothing like accenting your rear. Would be good for a female superhero, up, up and away! My favorite was that black little number by Daniel. I think this is my second favorite by him, maybe it's just him? He's cute in a bad boy Astin Kutcher sort of way, yummy! Suede wins the challenge and a very sweet Natalie Portman, who looks like she's ten, says she would wear that. I think she has a penchant for strips of fabric just look at her green cocktail dress. Reminded of me of those chinese enamel fishes that bends at the gills. His reward, selling his dress on Bluefly. Speaking of Bluefly, do you get those Bluefly commercials where the woman who is wearing nothing goes through the airport screening? First of all she'd be arrested and second, what it is that Bluefly sells? It's like have nothing to wear, then think Bluefly. I have no idea what kind of stuff Bluefly sells. From the show, it looks like just accessories. The commercial doesn't tell us anything, but I digress! The two worst dresses had one thing in common, they were out of the same shiny brown fabric, which screamed cheap, cheap, cheap! LeAnn made a dress for Peter Pan, what were those flappy things? And Wesley's brown home economics dress. I think Welsley home ec dress was so poorly made, that the judges probably thought he needs to go back and with that he is aufed. As usual, this one was fun and I hate Heidi Klum, why does she always look so perfect?!-Single D

This week the designers have to make cocktail dresses out of "green" fabrics with the models doing the shopping. Stella immediately starts complaining about sending out someone who has no idea what she is doing. Hello, weren't you the one who bought trash bags? They send their models on their way with some of the designers yelling, "don't forget the closures"! I can see it now, the dress is fitted, almost done and OMG where is the zipper?! Half the designers threw away at least one piece of fabric right away and a few of the girls came back with the same brown satin stuff. Since when is satin "green" anyway. As Tim says, make it work!

Stella starts complaining that her model wants a dress that she just doesn't do and decides to make her own thing. Fortunately for her, her model ends up loving it. Biker chic is not particularly my thing since I'm not exactly a 90 pound, young 20 something.

Suede is emerging as this season's Christopher poodle dog. He has even dubbed himself Team Licious. His dress, so far, is anything but, looking more like a road map exploded with all of those fabric strips. He indeed made it work and managed to clean it up and comes out the winner of the challenge.

I thought sure Kenly would win with her simple elegant dress with the high collar. She got so many complements on it that it looked like a sure thing. It was one of my favorites for what it's worth.

Leanne and Wesley end up in the bottom two. They both had the same hideous brown satin fabric and neither one did anything good with it. Even the models looked uncomfortable wearing the dresses. Leanne gets lucky as Wesley gets aufed. Now go recycle those ugly brown dresses! Double D