Survivor-Gabon-Premiere

First of all let me say that Gabon Africa looks totally awesome, different from the Survivor Africa that my favorite good guy Ethan won. That survivor was a hot, dry and dusty experience. Gabon is lush, green, tropical and beautiful. This one will definitely go on my bucket list. And best of all, they already have huts made for them. The only thing they needed was to figure out the latrine situation, do they really poop in the ground and wipe themselves with leaves? Already there is one tribe in trouble. I thought when Jeff asked for the two oldest survivors to step up and pick their teams, that Gillian, being the seasoned woman would be wise and pick from the handsome display of male physique. But no, she picks women, it's like Michelle said, the dumbest people in the world. The first challenge is to sprint up a hill which we know are going to separate the weak from the strong. I definitely thought Ms. Olympic sprinter would have no trouble climbing up that hill, but she blamed her 10lb tennis and dress. I concluded right there and then that Fong's women were totally pathetic. When Jeff said Fong, it sounded like thong, maybe that's the African version? Kota on the other hand has the dream team, with old geezer Bob as the patriarch making benches out of twigs. All Gillian could suggest was to gather elephant dung and pick out the seeds to eat it. Ah, ask that about 3 days in when people are starting to get hungry, then maybe elephant dung will sound tasty. The Geek and the Skank on Fong's team immediately bond as good little outcast usually do, while Marcus, resident physician, and Charlie, token gay boy, strike an immediate friendship. I'm think Charlie probably is hoping to convert Marcus to the boy's team, but Marcus says, it may be Eden, but this is not Adam and Adam.

On the first evening, Randy, mister pessimistic photog, on Fong's tribe hits his noggin a bloody gusher. He asks Gillian for some nurse's aid, which she counters that she can't see. The night vision camera shows him bleeding profusely so they call in the Survivor Medics. Once again, nothing like jungle surgery in the wild.

Fong manages to lose two challenges because they just plain gave up. The first survivor to take the walk of shame was Michelle, whose very words come back to haunt her, playing with the dumbest survivors. In this case, the tribe votes Michelle off, a strong women and the first one up the hill to keep Gillian, the resident Pollyanna den mother. The second challenge the winning Kota tribe sends the lawyer, Dan to exile island. Instead of choosing the comfort, Dan chooses the clue to find the hidden immunity idol. He should have chosen comfort, because he sucked at figuring the clue.

So this two hour premiere in a nutshell:

Fong tribe sucks

GC nominated leader

GC abdicates his leadership

Michelle voted out

Gamer boy sad

Charlie in love with Marcus

Marcus in love with himself

Dan the lawyer not too smart

Gillian voted out. Fong tribe in trouble.

-Single D