The Bachelorette-And So Ed Goes

For Michael the break dancer (I'm wondering what is he going to be when he grows up?) it's a one on one date as they zip line through the mountains. One thing, Jillian screams like a squealing piglet. Squeak, squeak. I just don't see those two together, he's way too immature for her. She needs a MAN! Dinner is in a wine cellar where the wine guy, you know the sommelier says he's going to teach them how to saber. Mike's like he's going to teach us how to fight? Ok he can be witty, but I just don't want someone whose personality is closer to my eleven year old daughter, brat man. During dinner, Mike tries and does displays his softer serious side and to which Jillian rewards by giving him a rose. The group date is snowmobiling. Now that looked like fun. Another junior brat man is Robby who quickly volunteers to ride with Jillian. Yep, he got it right when Jillian chose to drive, she's got way more testosterone than he does. Wes finally admits on camera, are you watching this Jillian? that sure he admits that appearing on TV will help his career, but clearly Jillian loves the bad boy. Aw come on Jillian, don't ya see Wes is someone so self centered, that if they were making love, Wes would probably be staring at the cover of his own CD or at his own reflection in the mirror thinking, damn, I'm hot!

Kiptynite sure looked better in his knit cap, but during their alone time, looked like Jillian had one too many drinks, she was all giggly and silly.

And then there's big, goofy, lovable lab, Ed telling Jillian, that he was on a conference call w/his boss and was given the ultimatum, either the show or your job. Now wait a minute, didn't I hear somewhere that everyone is isolated from outside communications? So how was it that Ed was on a conference call and didn't he tell them that this whole bachelor thing might last more than just a few weeks? He's not telling us the whole story, he probably wanted out thinking that he 1-was not attracted to her and it was a big waste of his time or that 2-he had a confidence problem and didn't stand a chance with the other guys. Either way, somethings rotten in Whistler. But Jillian being Jillian, is like, well, that's too bad, but it's all about me so here's a rose for some encouragement. She didn't care one drop that he might lose his job (if that was the case), she cried weepy tears because she was thinking why are all the guys leaving me am I not worthy? (Maybe she knew something we didn't?) Jillian cried so much in this episode, she was almost to the point of being grossly snotty and pathetic, I'm thinking Shannon here!

Jesse, the wine maker gets the other one on one date to a glacier, which was totally awesome. I like the initials in the snow. That was truly romantic. So since big, lovable lab, Ed left it was only one was being dismissed at the rose ceremony, which unfortunately was not Wes. He should have been eliminated just for wearing that hideous tweed looking jacket. What was that thing? Looked like he stole it off a homeless person. In the end, it was Mark that was given his walking papers. He didn't seem too upset, she should have gotten rid of him before she let Mike go. I guess with Mark, she knew his frozen personality would be too hard to thaw.-Single D

Get Me Out of Here I'm A Celebrity

Ok, I'll admit it, I have seen a few episodes of "Get Me Out of Here, I'm a Celebrity", but just by accident for the lack of something mind stimulating on TV (ya right). I haven't watched it with any regularity, but when I do catch it, it's like slowing down for an accident. You just can't help being a lookie loo. When I first heard of it, the name Sanjaya caught my attention, you know that borderline can't carry a tune, Mohawk sporting ex idol contestant wannabe, was going to be on it. Sanjaya a celebrity? Who knew? And who were all those other people? Ok, I do recognize Janice Dickinson, you just can't miss that foul, loud obnoxious mouth and Lou Diamond Phillips of "La Bamba" fame. Lou Diamond's head on the show looks more and more ETish, in a endearing sort of way but his body, well hubba hubba, that's not ET for sure. It is pumped up and brawny, looks like he pumps iron (do they still call it that?) in his spare time, so that's what D-listers do after the fame, either that or he's spent time in prison. Looks like the celebrities start out fairly fresh as they make their way to their camp in Costa Rica which looks more like a stage Hollywood setting. Are they really in the jungle of Costa Rica? Come on, they're on some back lot stage right, with a Starbucks right around the corner. With each episode the celebrities are becoming more and more cruddy, dirty and primitive. One night I happened on it to see the camp in night vision and there is Janice squatting in front of her cot. What is she doing? She's looking over here and over there. I'm thinking maybe she's trying to steal someone's food or boots or something, but then she gets up and goes back to bed. The next day, Lou comes to camp with a note from the producers that tells the celebrities not to pee in camp as it attracts rats and rats attract snakes. Oh no she wasn't, peeing on TV? She is so gross! As Lou says the cameras are rolling 24/7, uh dud! And the way she piggies the food with her mouth stuff she goes back for more, gee ya think she was an orphan (I know because I do that, and I was previously orphaned). And why is her face always so shiny, is that night creme or humidity? Just accentuates that awful plastic surgery.

No one knows or cares about Heidi and Spencer. Reality check Spencer, you are not the world's greatest celebrity. What are you famous for again?

Well if you happened to catch it, it might be some good mindless entertainment, from Janice peeing to a Steven Baldwin baptismal of Spencer, it's just plain fun.-Single D