Dancing with the Stars Season 12 Line Up

Here’s the just announced line-up for season 12:

Sugar Ray Leonard-know him from boxing fame

Chelsea Kane-who is she?

Romeo, where for art thou? and who the hell are you?

Ralph Macchio-my cousin Vinny and Karate Kid-love him!

Petra Nemcova-probably some beautiful Russian Model or tennis player

Kendra Wilkinson-of playboy fame?

Hines Ward-sound country

Mike Catherwood-is he an athlete?

Wendy Williams-the next wannabe Oprah

Chris Jericho-sounds like some soap star

and Kirstie Alley-my favorite TV star-I'll watch just because of her!

Two Finales-One Conclusion

Two of what used to be my favorite shows are coming to a anti-climatic finish. What has happened to all the talent that used to be show cased on American Idol? I think during the audition episodes, the judges are seeing way too many of the untalented masses that they are not getting to see the real talent that is out there. Let's face it, every city they go to there are what 30-40 thousand waiting to audition. By the end of audition week, they must have had close to 1/2 million try out. First of all, how do they even audition that many people? Sure they must go through the screening process with the totally outrageously bad ones sent forward, while the talented ones get sent home. There must be talented people out there or are they all on Glee? Which by the way is my new favorite show. Finally a show that mirrors my life! Life after all is a musical. My daughter and I have a favorite line, which any time a word evokes a song, we always say, I feel a song coming on! This season of American Idol was full of semi-talented, I don't know what I wannabes. And what was up with Sioban? As my grandmother would say, such a pretty face, but the clothes? You don't need a get-up if you can sing. And don't get me wrong, Crystal can sing, shades of Janis Joplin and definitely born in the wrong decade as evident by that old fashion mic stand. Looked like she stole a main street lamp post and glued a mic holder to it. Busted flat in Baton Rouge. She can sing, if you like folk music. Lee's ok, with that raspy husky voice, but is it worthy for super stardom? I think not. Does he have that star quality? No, seems like a nice enough dude, but superstar? Naw. What I can say, the two finalist seem like really nice people and deserve at least some good fortune, but will they reach the stratosphere like Kelly Clarkson or Carrie Underwood, I don't think so. My bet, Crystal, she's been the front runner all season. Ellen looks so out of sorts as the judge on the show. She seems awkward and ungainly. She should just be real and say that her opinion from a totally layman's point of view, or from a listener's point of view. It's ok that she doesn't have all the lingo down, she doesn't need to be technical, she just needs to represent what we the listeners are hearing with a little sly humor thrown in. Maybe she'll get better, but right now she looks like the geek hanging out with the cool kids.

As for DWTS, I hope Evan wins. If predictions hold true that every Olympian has won (Kristi Yamaguchi) then he deserves it. He's mesmerizing and determined. The cast this season, a yawner. The bachelor, Jake totally disappointing and I've so totally changed my opinion of him. Vienna can have him. He seems so needy and nerdy. Not at all the hunk that he started out to be. Dancing reduced him to a tottering tot. I would have liked to see Kate make it further. Come on, it needed some laughs in what was a very dreary season.-Single D

Melissa After the Bachelor

What do you do after you have been dumped by the bachelor on national TV? Why "Dancing With The Stars" of course! That's where you'll see Melissa Rycroft teaming with Tony Dovolani after Nancy O'Dell bowed out with a torn meniscus. With 48 hours to prepare, she and Tony waltzed their way to a 23 (out of 30!). Grace under pressure and as Bruno said, the bachelor he's a loser, L on the forehead. Go Melissa, you looked beautiful, elegant and graceful. Jason eat your heart out!

PROFESSION:Bachelor star PARTNER:Tony Dovolani

-Single D

Dancing with the Stars-Fake Boobs, Underwear and Broken Ankles

Ok, did anyone take notice the other night of Susan Lucci's obviously enormously fake bosoms? They were the dominate feature of her outfit and of her dance that my daughter said I can't stop looking at them (and she's 10). I said yeah I know. The twin sisters were just too prominent to miss and competed for air time. Yep, they won. What a bad boob job and she can afford the best. If I were her I'd want a refund. They even mesmerized the judges, especially Len, that dirty old man! Speaking of Len, he is getting on my last nerve. He has beaten down one of the better teams of Lacey and Lance so much, that their routine was so whitewashed and insipid I was like who are these people? I love, love, love Lacey's style and her routines are fresh and contemporary, but they succumbed to Len's critical comments and tried to dance the way he wanted, only for him to come back and say that Lance was clopping around flat footed. No winning for trying, I say, do your own thing girl! I don't think Cloris Leachman will get eliminated. We just want to keep her around for the entertainment value. But please can we not see anymore crotch shots with her legs up over her head! That is just wrong. Poor Cloris, Corky throws her around like she weighs a ton, a sack of dead weight. She's about as light as a sinking ship. Cloris and Corky, sounds like a morning talk show.

My daughter really liked Cody Linley's hair although I think he looks too young like he's all of what twelve? He's way too young looking and way too skinny. Poor Julianne, she probably weighs more that he does. He dances alright, but he just doesn't do it for me. He's still in potty training.

Football player, Warren Sapp is so light on his feet. He's like an elephant in a tutu. When I see him dance it's like watching Disney's Fantasia all over again. Not to mention that he's just downright lovable. I'm surprised there aren't Warren Sapp teddy bears yet.

Misty May had to bow out of the competition after snapping her Achilles tendon. When they did the replay of the practice you could hear it actually snap like a bony twig. Well, being the athlete that she is, I don't think she had a chance of winning. She was just all legs and lean stiff torso, good for volleyball, but not for the dance floor. My only dismay is that Maxim will not be dancing and I just love to watch him. He's so charming, I could watch him all evening, sigh!

Brooke Burke proved that she's perfect again! Hate her! I'm sure she's already looking for a place to hang that mirror ball in her house. -Single D

Dancing with the Stars

My daughter piped up the other day and said that she has to watch Dancing with the Stars. I'm like why? She barely watches American Idol, except for the audition parts in which she laughs hysterically and tries to mimic the auditions. Her interest in Dancing is to watch somebody named Cody Lindley, (some Hannah Montana personality) dance. Apparently she thinks he's cute, although she will never admit it, saying only that her friend Vanessa thinks he's cute. She thought by the way, that he danced pretty good but hated his slicked back hair. Hair is a big thing for tweeners. I thought he was pretty good, a little wooden, but he does have one of the better teachers, Julianna Hough, she's so cute, hate her!

Cutie chef Rocco DiSpirito was totally yummy but he's better behind a stove, Rocco, you can come cook for me anytime! The funniest moment of the entire evening was 82 year old Cloris Leachman. She's 82 years old and danced like an 82 year old, leaving her walker behind and baring cleavage and all, letting Len Goodman to comment, mind your cleavage. Ok, no one wants to see cleavage that old. Cloris needs more dancing lessons especially to lose that I'll have another martini belly. I have to give her snaps tho, it takes courage to do that, but I guess at her age who cares. Now where's my Lark!

I thought the best team was Lance Bass and Lacey Schwimmer (of So You Think You Can Dance fame). Lacey, not your traditional ballroom dancer injected a much needed fresh approach to the stale dance routines. Len, step into the 21st Century, you old man! Another team to watch, Brooke Burke and Derek Hough. I know the reason why most people will be watching them, but I do have to comment that Brooke's body is amazing. She's got to be a clone, an experiment in the body perfect, not to mention that she's coordinated to boot!

And then there's everyone's favorite soap star, Susan Lucci. She looked like a little doll, so tiny and perfect, too bad Mattel didn't make her arms and legs bendable.-Single D