Top Chef - Restaurant Wars!

Chef Tom wakes up the chefs to work the egg station at a Chicago landmark, Lou Mitchell's as their quickfire challenge. The chefs all have the final four in their sites. I say one challenge at a time guys because you all know that Richard has a spot, most likely Stephanie and Antonia. 4th place is up for grabs at this point. Antonia is finally starting to show her culinary stuff, it's about time! The owner of Lou Mitchell's looks very rough, the kind of person you don't want mad at you. The chefs take turns at the egg station cooking, eggs of course along with the breakfast meats. It was fast and furious with eggs flying all over. Antonia was first at the station and held her own to the satisfaction of the owner. Spike, who said he used to be a line cook, fell behind quickly and Stephanie couldn't fry her way out of the kitchen. I know I couldn't cook like that, I have a new appreciation for the cooks at my favorite breakfast spot! Antonia wins the challenge and is told she will get an advantage in the elimination challenge. The elimination challenge is restaurant wars! This is my favorite challenge. I was afraid since they had wedding wars that they wouldn't have it. Antonia's advantage? She gets to chose her team. She wisely picks Richard and Stephanie, the same team they won wedding wars. Dale wastes no time alienating his team mates and putting them on edge by trying to take over. I say let him. The guy is talented, he might pull if off, he might not. If not, it's all on him. The teams get $1500 to spend on food and $5000 for decor. Dale's team decides to go Asian. Spike takes the front of the house and ends up decorating all by himself as Lisa and Dale (who appoints himself head chef) do all the cooking. Their menu will consist of short ribs, coconut laksa with grilled prawns and butterscotch scallops with Dale's Halo Halo and sticky rice with coconut for dessert. Butterscotch scallops? Maybe it will be good, who knows. Antonia's team decides to go with a modern American gastro pub theme. What the heck is that, gourmet chicken wings and upscale nachos? Stephanie will run the front of the house with Richard as the head chef. Instead of chicken wings and nachos, they come up with linguine & clams, trout & cauliflower and broiled loin of lamb and braised lamb shank. Now we find out Chef Tom's replacement for this challenge is my fave Anthony Bourdain! Chef Anthony comes bearing good news, the teams get to chose a helper from the chefs that were sent packing. Dale, who gets to chose first, picks Jen which makes Lisa happy and Antonia is ecstatic since she needs someone to make pasta so she naturally picks Nikki. Dale wants to make his signature Halo Halo for dessert but ends up putting in a rotten avocado only noticing when the mixture comes out brown. Ok, Dale is a chef, how does a chef not know he is cutting a rotten avocado? Dale gets in a bad mood which puts everyone else in a bad mood (boy do I know how that feels when someone you work with is in a bad mood). Dale pulls Lisa's rice off the burner so it didn't get "sticky". Dale tries to give suggestions to fix the rice but pretty much leaves it up to Lisa to do it. After making the pasta, Nikki finds the clams really gritty. Antonia says she already washed the clams but Nikki insists they are gritty forcing Antonia to rewash them all. Everyone gets ready and it's show time! Spike comes right out and tells his first guests that his team will win the competition. Now that's confidence. I guess he didn't see, or notice, what was going on behind the scenes. The judges were loving Antonia's team. Even the dishes they didn't like they at least liked the presentation. They also liked the fact they were thinking outside the box. Dale thought everyone was making mistakes except him. Anthony Bourdain described the sticky rice as baby vomit with wood chips. Spike was doing a pretty good job keeping everything together out front while the rest of the team were duking it out in the kitchen. At least Jen can leave. At judge's table, Antonia's team wins with Stephanie being the individual winner. Her prize - a trip to Spain. Sweet! This means, of course, that Dale's team wasn't so lucky. Chef Anthony comes out with guns blazing asking who chose the table cloths and who's idea was it to make the scallops in butterscotch. Dale is so busy throwing everyone under the bus that he can't, or won't, remember what he did or didn't do. Lisa told the judges that Dale told her what rice to use and he naturally denies it. He SO told her what rice to use and went as far as to tell her to follow the directions on the package! This team has way too many I's in it. As the judges tell Lisa her shortcomings her expression got more and more sour. If looks could kill. Spike starts to jump in a few times and wisely shuts up after one of the judges tells him that he is not safe just because he was in the front of the house. Dale is told to pack his knives and go. While Dale is saying his goodbyes, Lisa just sits in her corner looking as if she wanted to take the head off someone. As long as Spike doesn't screw up royally next week I think Lisa is the next to go. Double D

Hell's Kitchen-Goodbye Roseann

Why is it that I always miss the first ten minutes? I come in to see Jen being transferred to the blue men's team much to the glee of Corey. Finally peace has come to the red team, or so they think. The food challenge involves 20 ingredients, 4 dishes and all ingredients must be used but not more than once. Sounds easy enough. The girls are methodical and portion out the items quickly while the blue team is trying to sort it out and takes up most of the 45 minutes to decide who will cook what. Jen's big mouth is not winning any points with the guy's team of course. She really is like a bull in a china shop. Well into the cooking we see Matt gasp as he claims that he sliced off the tip of his finger. Ouch that's gotta hurt. They call for the medic and whisk him out of the kitchen. Yikes is there blood on the cutting board? Chef Ramsay ask does anyone know where the finger is as the girls peer into a pan of cooking pancetta. Ick! Guess I know where I won't be eating tonight! I don't know if they ever found the tip, however, I'm wondering if that counted as one of the 20 items? Down to the final few seconds and Louross is debating whether he should put the veal with his fish as he doesn't want to wreck the taste. Hey buddy, you don't have a choice, do ya? You have to use all the ingredients! That narcisstic decision cost the blue team a win and so they are stuck with hand washing all the linens, while the red team gets the In Style photo shoot. You knew the girls would win. Chef Ramsay always makes the girls win for that photo shoot. I think he thinks he looks better with women draped all over him rather than sweaty guys. I was surprised how well the girls cleaned up. I could barely recognize them. Meanwhile Jen is cursing at Louross for not putting the veal on his dish, how could you be so stupid! Louross is getting mad at Jen's attitude, hey I'd be pissed too! Now go do my laundry!

That evening the surprise guest for this dinner service are two food critics, one from Zagat and the other one I don't remember, all I know is that she was stuffing food in her mouth. Hey, I want that job! The blue team falters when Petrozza cuts the beef too soon. Who cut the beef? But that was their only trip up as the girls quickly fall apart and Chef Ramsay sends the tearful red team out of the kitchen and makes the blue team finish their dinner service. After the service ends, Chef Ramsay tells them that the critics declared the blue team the winners, much to Jen's obvious delight. He tells Corey to chose two from her team for nomination. She picks Matt and Roseann, but Chef also calls out Christina. After an English beating, he sends Roseann back to the line but wait, not so fast cookie, he then decides to fire her. Aw man, that's mean! He's had it in for Roseann from the first NY accented word she spoke in his kitchen. And so with that, Roseann is stripped of her chef coat. Hey, have you noticed when Chef Ramsay says 'Piss off" it's really a term of endearment? Honey I love you, piss off!-Single D

American Idol-The Finale-Duel of the Davids

Let me be brief-David Archuleta wins American Idol!!!!

Well, that's the way I had imagined in my mind, but here's what happened:

Finale countdown and it's the duel of the Davids. American Idol played it off like a boxing match between heavy hitter, David Cook and the lightweight contender, David Archuleta. They even had that boxing announcer, what's his name, as ringmaster. This was really a showdown of two different styles of singing. David Cook the rocker wannabe and the soulfully pure voice of David Archuleta. I like them both and they will both be successful I'm sure. Does David Cook have the kind of voice that you will remember in the years ahead or will his fame come from rocking some really great tunes like rock bands before him. Really, no one remembers a rockers voice, they only remember the song. Can you really say that Cook has a memorable voice? Will he be remembered as one of the great singers from American Idol. Can he match the vocal skills of Carrie Underwood or Kelly Clarkson? I think not. He'll make a great lead singer for a band, like Daughtry, but as a solo artist, not hardly. Little David does need some more maturing and experience. He's definitely wet around the edges and you can so totally see the difference in their ages. David Cook is more polish and secure on stage which in a few more years David A, will be there too. I think David A. made a believer out of Simon Cowell, as Simon was on Ellen the other day saying that he was hoping for Cook to win. That night, Simon told little David that it was a knockout declaring David A. the winner! You made a believer out of Simon and if you made a believer out of one of Idol's most caustic judges then you must be it! I didn't have a shadow of doubt that David A would not walk away with the crown, wrong! First of all, let me say that the final night of Idol was way too long, about an hour too long. I started to lose my interest right around the nine o'clock hour when I decided to go on my computer and what is on the internet, but the Idol spoiler! David Cook wins the Idol Crown it screams across my screen! What! So I quickly type in Zabasearch, this website has been predicting Idol spoilers and there on it's website it declares David Cook as the winner, stats and all. I was so disappointed that David A didn't win, that I didn't watch the rest of the idol finale. I'm sure David A will get signed on to some record deal, but it would have been nice to see this humble kid win. David Cook wasn't even interested in singing, he just auditioned on a whim and now look at him, winner of American Idol. Well, good luck David Cook, hope you're not just a flash in the pan to fade to black and white like some previous idol contestants. Meanwhile, I'm sure we haven't heard the last from David Archuleta, at least while his dad is in charge! -Single D

DeAnna-The Bachelorette

Poor DeAnna, I felt so bad when the bachelor, Brad Womack jilted her at the bachelor alter. I even wrote about his actions leading up to his dismissal of her in our blog about the Bachelor. He was stomping around the grass like he was begging for time. I thought the ring fell out of his pocket or maybe he stepped in some stinky poo, but no, no ring, just stinky poo for DeAnna. She was so relieved when he told her he sent Jenni home, the man is mine she thought! But it was not to be. Brad, scruffy beard and all, was in the end, afraid of committment and wasted the time of 25 ladies and sent DeAnna packing. A collective gasp could be heard thundering through America. Even when she appeared in the After the Rose episode, he made her cry because she was still carrying the tiniest of torches for him. Well, DeAnna managed to get herself up and dust herself off and got a gig on one of Ellen's episode, where Ellen told her that she should be the next Bachelorette and lo and behold, she gets the call. I don't know if Ellen was responsible, but Thanks Ellen!

DeAnna makes a great Bachelorette. Pretty, smart, funny and sincere. Kinda of a Greek Trista, remember her and Ryan fame? This time it's DeAnna's turn and she has her hands full. Her assortment of bachelors range from a science teacher, pro basketball player, snowboarder to oyster farmer. Immediately right off the bat, the little bio on Kirk, single dad, makes you want him to marry DeAnna, kid and all. I loved it when the guys gathered in the room and said that their little hearts were racing upon meeting her. Gee just like a girl! It was funny how so many guys had to twrill DeAnna when meeting her. I guess the macho for "Hi". I loved it when Chris Hansen said that there are 25 guys that will make you forget about Brad and her reply was "Brad who?", go girl! Her garden variety of men, include chef Robert who in the middle of everything decides to cook her crab dip. I was wondering if he gave them his grocery list before the show began. There's the token guy virgin, Ryan, pro football player. I don't like calling a guy a virgin, he should be called something like a guygin. There's the little oyster farmer from South Carolina. I wonder if he knows Bubba Gump? There's Sean, a master martial arts borderline mullet head kicking lemons off the head of odd ball Jesse's (snow boarder) head. To which Jesse's says that if he misses, once he wakes up, he's going to punch his nuts 5 times! What just 5 times? The guys try to get DeAnna's attention, just like the bachelorettes of previous but in reverse. It's a shark infested pool. Jenni makes a surprise visit to help DeAnna give out her three first impression roses. DeAnna gives out the first rose immediately. It seems she likes scruffy dark haired guys. Jenni puts the guy through a barrage of quickfire questions, do you want children, how many, have you been married before..... Who knew Jenni and DeAnna are good friends. I guess being jilted by the same guys gives the girls common ground. DeAnna gets several gifts, one from the oyster farmer, a beautiful pearl necklace. Too bad he doesn't have a chance. Richard gives DeAnna a Herkermer diamond (not a real diamond but a crystal) to which he says he would like to substitute it with the real one eventually, sweet. In the end, she let go 10 guys. Looks like this season going to be fun and maybe, DeAnna will get lucky and meet someone special. -Single D

DeAnna does have her hands full, yes siree! But what a bunch to have your hands full with! There is such a range of guys from geeky to hunky. It still seems strange to see the men getting out of the limo instead of women. Those guys can party! You can see them with the glasses in hand in the limo and then, after greeting DeAnna, go into the house and have more cocktails. That should loosen up some tongues.

I was so not digging the dress DeAnna wore. She looked uncomfortable in it, stepping on it every time she moved and, yes it did make her butt look big! Some of the fare up for sampling by our heroine include Sean a martial arts guy with an ego but cute, Jon who is into his hair, I'm sorry but if a guy takes more time with his hair than I do it's time for him to go! Then we have Ryan the virgin pro football player, now I watch football and I have never heard of this guy, he must be something like 5th string and seeing how he is from Minnesota, he must be with the Vikings. He is also a BAD singer, bless his heart! Now Jeremy the real estate attorney $$$ cha-ching! Let's keep him around for the money factor, Brian the hunky high school football coach, I'll take him thank you! Spero the actor is the strangest looking person I have ever seen, Twilly (what kind of name is that?) has no upper lip, how do you kiss someone with no upper lip?

The first impression roses go to Jeremy ($$$), Jesse the snow boarder and his multicolor dream coat and the science teacher. I guess she is in to geeky guys. After the first impression roses are given out, the rest of the guys scramble to get DeAnna's attention. As Chandler is trying to impress her, Brian whips out his abs of steel, grabs DeAnna's hand and has her touch his abs. She didn't seem real impressed with that but touched him all the same. While talking with Graham, DeAnna let go that she worked as a bartender for 9 years. Didn't she say she was 26? So that would mean she was a bartender at the age of 17. Must have been in Canada. Paul in his attempt to get DeAnna's attention, jumps in the pool. He starts taking off his clothes while walking out of the pool and displays his underwear/swim pants that has DeAnna's name embroidered on the back to which she exclaims, "that boy has my name on his booty!" If that doesn't get her attention, nothing will!

As the time nears for the rose ceremony, the guys seem to be having a great time. Out come Chris to announce the ceremony. I guess that is his only job, to come out and state the obvious. He also comes out to say, gentleman, there is one rose left. You think they have to be told that? DeAnna made some good choices. By the last rose, I knew that because Chris said so, I was holding my breath for Brian. DeAnna picks Brian with the last rose and I exhaled, I just want a chance to see his abs again. Let the dating begin! Double D

The Llamas family photos

The mother Michele

The father-Lorenzo

The daughter-Shane

Tila Teliqua-Shot at Love # 2

It's Bi-nanza (how many different ways will she use that pun?) time at the house as Tila's challenge for a date is ride'm cowboys and cowgirls. How is it that prime young studs (or so they think) and young women (can they be called that?) can't hold on to a mechanical bull to save their lives? This is mechanical bull riding for toddlers 101. The bull is in an inflatable wading pool so the contestants don't get bruised up should they fall off. The bull is going in slo mo, about 1 turn per every 5 minutes. How hard is that? Are these people wimps or what. How is it that prime young studs (at least they think they are) fall off after 10 seconds? They whole thing was so lame, I had to go to the kitchen to get myself a snack. When I came back, Tila was announcing that the losers were going to cook chili. Gee can I be on the losing team. I would have loved to cook chili, that should have been the challenge, a Bi-Chili cook off. Everyone was criticizing Bo for taking charge of the cooking, hey I love it when a man can cook!

The next thing we know everyone is in the pool for a pool party, more like a pool orgy. The girls are stacking up on Tila as the guys watch, mouths open, drool dropping. Snap those mouths shut and roll up your tongues guys. I imagine that scene was every guys dream come true. Jersey was so excited he wanted some of the action, but Tila definitely was not feeling it and things came to a screeching halt. The next challenge for the two on one date is down drench derby, cranking water into a bucket until it falls over and drenches the two pairs. Lisa and Kyle win the date. Kyle is showing his creepy side again by asking Tila strange sexual questions, like have you ever done it on top of a fridge, in a cave, on a boat, well maybe not exactly those questions, but something to that effect, just plain gross. No wonder they call him kreepy Kyle. When Lisa gets her private time with Tila, kreepy Kyle just kept staring at them. Kreepy Kyle is krazy! Lisa gets the kiss, while Kreepy Kyle get the kan, along with sweet George. He reminded me of last season's Italian Stallion Domenico, just as sweet but without the accent. Poor George, everyone was crying at his departure, I guess he was beloved by the house, but not by Tila. Tila said to Jersey, don't make me regret sending George home. You will honey, you will. As George summed it up, good guys do finish last, and at that cut to Chad head butting really hard Bo....to be continued!

PS-Kyle you're probably not as kreepy as you came off, just stop staring and take some lessons in how to act in front of a girl! -Single D

Top Chef - Box lunch

We join our chefs this week as they are coming down from the wedding. Andrew is still on a culinary high saying he is either going to stab somebody or cook some amazing food. I'm hoping for the amazing food. Sam Talbot from season two is the guest judge this week. He's still a cutie! The quickfire challenge is to make a "sexy" salad in 45 minutes. The chefs get busy and come up with creations like, Antonia's poached egg and wild mushroom salad with bacon vinegrette, Lisa's banana, squid, lobster salad with grapefruit vinegrette sounded like a mess to me. Spike wins the challenge with his sensual beef salad with pineapple, yum! He doesn't win immunity but is told that he will get an advantage in the elimination challenge. The elimination challenge is to make a healthy box lunch for Chicago cops. They are to take a typical policeman's box lunch and make it healthy. Spike's advantage for this challenge - he can chose up to four ingredients that no one else can use. They go to Whole Foods to get their supplies. They have to make something incorporating a vegetable, fruit, protien and a whole grain. Chefs have to wait until Spike picks his advantage ingredients before they can shop. Spike is too much enjoying his shopping waving his picks in front of the others. He picks chicken, tomatoes, lettuce and bread so no one else can use these ingredients. The girls grumble that they better see Spike use all of those ingredients. Richard and Andrew keep changing their recipes as Spike picks each ingredient. Richard decides on lentil and tuna burritos while Andrew makes sushi using pine nuts and parsnips as the rice with salmon and veggies as the filling. Dale makes bison rolls using cabbage in place of lettuce and Lisa comes up with edamame and shrimp stir fry with hot sauce but says that someone burned her rice. Everyone pretty much used the fruit as a side or in a dessert. As everyone is cooking, the camera keeps panning over to the microwaves showing the GE logo. I guess GE gave them a big sponsorship. It's lunch time and the cops come in for the feast. I kept looking for my husband's cousin who is a Chicago cop, but I didn't she her. Hi Tara! As they make their selections, Spike only puts out two or three of his dishes telling everyone they are going fast so they better grab one. Did anyone bother to tell Spike that it doesn't matter how many he serves but that it has to taste good? Richard keeps asking everyone, "do you like burritos?" which I thought was pretty clever, get them in the mind set that they are eating high calorie burritos instead of healthy ones. As the judges come in, Chef Tom is confident the chefs will be serving healthy tasty dishes. Chef Tom tastes Lisa's dish with the hot sauce which brings tears to his eyes. What? Don't like spicy? Andrew's sushi did not hold together at all and wasn't very tasty and the judges get confused about Spike's lack of using the lettuce and tomatoes in his dish which was chicken salad. At judges table, the judges like Stephanie's meatball and mushroom soup and Dale's bison rolls with mango and cucumbers. Dale wins with a prize of a magnum of Rutherford Hill Merlot and tickets to visit the winery in Napa Valley. Nice prize! Can I go? I love Napa and Rutherford Hill Merlot! Andrew, Spike and Lisa are the bottom three. Andrew starts questioning the rules which doesn't sit well with the judges. Andrew did not use a grain in his dish opting to use the ground pine nuts & parsnips in place of rice. Lisa still says someone burned her rice when it's possible she did it herself. Spike seemed surprised that he is one of the bottom three and the judges remind him that he used his advantage to the detriment of the other chefs. They also said that he just made chicken salad to which Spike challenged the judges saying what do they know about salty and sweet combinations. Looks like they know quite a bit Spike, that's why they are sitting at the table and you aren't! The judges had not commented on Andrew's lack of using a grain in his dish so Lisa points this out to the judges. Andrew jumps on Lisa for this then Lisa starts to say "I'm sorry, I didn't realize you didn't use....." when Andrew cuts her off saying thanks for calling me out. In the back room waiting for the judges decision, Andrew goes after Lisa for calling him out and Lisa fires back then Andrew tells her she shouldn't whine about her burnt rice. Go to your corners kids, it's over! As Andrew tries to brush off the tire tracks from the bus he was thrown under, the judges tell him to pack his knives and go. Hopefully the guys and gals of the Chicago Police Department had a good time! Double D

Hell's Kitchen-Taste Testing

Matt is overjoyed at his defection to the girls team, but for the girls he's going to need to prove himself before he's accepted. Now I don't really have an opinion about him, but I tend to think that he is probably misjudged alot because he always wears a scowl on his face. It's just his natural face but it's always in frown mode. Poor guy, I know plastic surgery could help that. The reward challenge involves the infamous palate taste testing. Both groups taste three dishes cooked up the the chef himself, chicken pot pie, beef stew, and raviolis, with one major ingredient missing! Everyone seems to think it's some kind of spice or something. Petrozzi thinks something is wrong with the meat but can't pinpoint it. Everyone loves the ravioli but doesn't realize it's missing the pork. The other dishes are made with tofu/soy substitute meat products instead of the chicken and beef. Now you would think they would be able to tell the difference between tofu and beef. The next challenge is the blind taste test. Again, how do you not know the taste of yams and nectarines? The girls are in the lead, when it comes down to the final taste test between rivals, Ben and Matt tasting the clam chowder. They had to name the 10 ingredients in the soup. Much to my surprise, Matt was able to name more ingredients and won the challenge for the girls. Winners get a spa treatment, losers clean the dorms. Matt is ecstatic that he won the challenge for the girls and seems to be enjoying the chocolate facial mask when Ben comes in to serve them tea. Hummm, chocolate mask, yum! The dinner service is pretty much the same rerun with Roseann messing up again and Louross in stall mode. Ben is by far the worst performer of the evening. Matt is so happy that Ben is getting hammered by Chef that it is translating into his putting out the best risotto that has ever been made in Hell's Kitchen according to Chef Ramsay. Matt is so proud his chest is puffed out like a proud rooster in a chicken coop. Unfortunately, it seems like both teams can't get their stuff together to make a complete dinner service, so it's "shut it down!". Chef Ramsay calls the men's team as the losers and for each of them to nominate someone. Back in the dorm, Ben is the first one to call on Louross to be nominated even tho it was Ben himself as the weakest member. Bobby doesn't want to go along with that and says why not each one of us vote for each other so that all four go up, which I thought very democratic. Petrozza is not sold on the idea and says he has to think about it. In front of Ramsay, each one nominates each other until it's Petrozza's turn. He says he can't nominate anyone, what! Come on, Ben was the weakest link, swallow crow and nominate him! Petrozzi says he will nominate himself. Chef Ramsay is surprise by his self sacrificing valor and knows that it took alot of guts to do that. In the end, it's Ben that is eliminated, he really needed to go, he was just plain mean, and as Matt said, karma will get you every time.-Single D

American Idol-Final Three

This week it's the battle of the final three-two David's and one Syesha. The evening was sort of a disappointment. I really didn't think they needed to sing 3 songs, that didn't show their vocal abilities at all. It left me wanting more, like Chinese food. I know I ate something, but I can't remember what it was. I think David Archuleta struggled last night. His song choices were terrible. I can see why his intrusive stage dad wanted them changed. The first song "And So It Goes" was alright, but his second, Chris Brown's song, which I absolutely love,"With You" was not good. I bet his dad chose that song. And the last producer's choice "Longer Than" was just ok. Big disappointment, since I'm a huge Archuleta fan. What can I say about Syesha, she looked amazing. I hated that "Fever" song-way too old for her to be singing. At least she has a great first name that can stand alone like all the other great single name artist like Cher and Madonna. I think David Cook had the better song choices, however, I'm not really a fan like I would go out and buy his CD. The judges have told David A that he needed more emotion in his eyes well what about David Cook, he always looks like a dead fish when he sings, there is absolutely no emotion in his eys. I think the final battle will be between the two Davids. I'm keeping my fingers crossed for David Archuleta, let's hope his dad keeps his golfers cap head out of David's singing!-Single D

The Bachelor-London Calling-Hollywood Ending

Gee, life is a Hollywood ending! An English bachelor comes calling and ends up with the American Dream and a Hollywood ending, but more on that later. Matt takes his remaining two women, Chelsea and Shayne to London to meet his parents, Trish and Tony and his brother, Simon. Sorry Simon, but Matt inherited the good looks in the family. Matt comes from your typical English stock, prim and proper parents, living in the typical English house you might expect, old English furniture and large paintings with gold gilt frames. Matt takes Chelsea for a ride on the Eye. When I was in London, that wasn't even built yet. Chelsea goes to meet Matt's parents for dinner at their house. Simon remarks on how pretty she is. To me it seems that Chelsea is trying really hard to impress Matt's parents, a little too hard. Matt's mom seems so nice and down to earth. I was wondering where dad Tony was during this, he just disappeared.

The next day, Matt meets Shayne and takes her on a double decker bus ride to see the sights of London. Shayne's outfit is very cute. Snaps! Shayne is amazed at London and says it looks like it's out of the movies. For someone being raised in a Hollywood family, she has done very little traveling. My daughter has more flier miles than she does! At first Simon said that he didn't think she was the right match for Matt, but then after talking with her, he thought her very mature and nice. Our blondie showed her confidence and maturity and held up to the scrunity of the meet the parents. The only time Matt's dad said anything was when Matt asked his family which one they liked better and he said Shayne. Go pops!

Back in Barbados and the Hilton, there's that Hilton sign again, the girls have one last date with Matt. Chelsea gives Matt a present, a cooler bag with cereal and surf board wax, not very romantic if you ask me. Just goes to show how there's not the warm and fuzzy vibe between them! She says it's for breakfast in bed. If I'm having breakfast in bed it better be croissants, scones, jelly and cappuccinos! And the wax is to teach Matt how to surf when he comes to California. Chelsea tells Matt that she's falling in love with him, but during their whole time together, she just seems so awkward and clumsy in the relationship and there's absolutely no chemistry there. Unlike Shayne, who seems so utterly at ease with Matt, gripping onto him like a baby chimp. Shayne and Matt's last date is para sailing which looked like so much fun. Shayne tells Matt "see what I do for you"!

Shayne's present to Matt is two frames with pictures of herself writing "I love you" in the sand. Now that's romantic! Matt still doesn't give us any hints of whom he's choosing, telling each one of them that he is falling in love with them. Is he allowed to say the "L" word?

Matt chooses the Tacori diamond ring, absolutely beautiful. He was holding it while standing on the balcony over the ocean, I was afraid he would drop it in the ocean! yikes!

I always get so nervous when the limos pull up, nervously pacing...which one will be the first one, like that would tell me which one he picks? Of course I'm hoping Shayne wins. The votes on our blog show the most votes cast for Shayne! Looks like America agrees. Out of the first limo is Chelsea, in a long flowing Grecian style dress. She goes to Matt and he shows no sign of nervousness. He gives her the customary, I think you're wonderful speech and then drops the but.....I've fallen in love with someone else! I was so ecstatic! There is a God after all!

Chelsea is crushed but manages to keep her composure until for one split second she blurted out "You picked the most falsest one!". Matt shot back "if you think I did, then you don't know me! "

In the next limo, Shayne makes her way to Matt, wearing a billowy yellow chiffon cocktail dress with her hair in a up swept duo and long bangs. I'm wondering if those diamond bracelets both ladies had on were real? Shayne meets Matt and he proceeds to tell her that she is amazing and that he has loved every second that they had together and then he drops to one knee as Shayne cries "Matt, Matt!" I could weep! It was so romantic! He says "Monkey, will you marry me?" It was just the perfect Hollywood ending with a montage of their bachelor journey. In the end, this season of London Calling was just perfect. I hope Matt and Shayne will be able to keep it going, but knowing the rate of breakup, that might be hard. Shayne's last word to him was "Matt, you have to promise me not to look at any other women, because you have looked at too many women during our relationship." Very funny! I'm just wondering if Shayne will be willing to give up her acting career for Matt and move to London? That's the big question mark in that ending, nonetheless, it was simply jolly well perfect! -Single D

It's the final two in London to meet the parents. Chelsea goes first and Matt takes her up in the London Eye. Not your typical ferris wheel with its stand up, glass enclosed gondolas with an amazing view. That would have been one of my "face my fear" things that Matt finds so sexy. On to Matt's parents house. Matt's brother Simon looked so serious until he tells Chelsea if she moves to England she will have to bring her Wellies. Matt's "mum" does all the grilling on Chelsea while his father was not very much a part of the picture. All I can say is Matt's family is obviously well-to-do with a huge house in London. Unless it's all staged and they really live in a two room flat in London's ghetto.

Next up is Shayne. He takes her to Hyde Park and on a double decker bus tour around the city. At the house bro Simon wasn't real sure about Shayne but she really warmed up to them and them to her. Matt's father asks Shayne how old she is to which she responded 12. I think she had them in the palm of her hand after that.

After Shayne leaves, Matt sits with his family to get their reaction to the two women. Mum & dad like Shayne saying she seems the more genuine of the two while Simon likes Chelsea. I say Simon wants Matt to pick Chelsea so he can have a crack at Shayne!

It's back to Barbados for one last date before the big rose ceremony. Matt takes Chelsea on a helicopter tour which ends up on a secluded beach. Chelsea looks like she finally has loosened up a bit and is actually having fun with Matt. She gives Matt a California Survival Kit consisting of cereal for breakfast in bed, surf wax because she wants to teach him to surf and a map for all of their travels. I thought it was clever, maybe not so romantic but clever.

Matt is still calling Shayne monkey, apparently because she clings to him as a monkey would. Matt takes her parasailing with her squealing all the way. Later, Shayne gives him a present of pictures of her writing I love you in the sand saying this is the most important present you will ever get from me. What no more imagination? After telling her she is the warmest, most genuine person he has ever met, she looks up, while rubbing her eyes and asks "did you like my present?" Now I like Shayne but, in that moment, she looked every bit a child being put to bed by a doting guardian.

At the rose ceremony, Chelsea arrives first all hopeful but gets the "I'm sorry but" speech from Matt. My heart went out to her because she did take so long to open up. I just hope she doesn't shut herself off from finding someone who can love her for herself.

Come on, didn't we all know it was going to be Shayne? Young, gorgeous, potential movie income what red blooded man wouldn't go for that? So Matt asks "monkey" to marry him to which she happily agrees.

As they stare into the sunset, we look forward to the Bachelorette next week! Double D

Survivor-Fan vs Favorites Finale!

I can't believe we've come to the end of another season of Survivor, this one being the best one in recent memory. I say memory, because once they leave the island, I can barely remember who participated! The girls are celebrating their victory over the mind bending blindside they played on unsuspecting naive Erik. They couldn't beat him in challenges, but proved that they could beat him in mind control. Great job! Amanda, Cirie, Parvati and Natalie get tree mail calling for them to prepare for their final 3 immunity challenge. This challenge of balance (on a pole in the ocean) and filling up the tube which held the key to the puzzle ladder on shore, was a challenge in quickness and concentration. I was holding my breath as Natalie takes a huge lead, but Amanda managed to keep steady and won immunity. I really didn't care who won as along as it wasn't Natalie! Ok, ok, I'm a favorites fan! It was pretty much a sealed deal that Natalie got eliminated, say goodbye Natalie, sorry to see ya go, you seemed to have lost steam at the end.

At tribal, the jury looks freshly polished and washed. Ozzy still looks pissed at Parvati, get over it Oz, it's a game and you lost! Erik seems to be taking his elimination with good humor and is all smiles.

At camp the girls decide to let the chicken, Gloria go. No wonder they didn't eat her, any animal with a name is a pet in my book. Now that it's just the girls, I'm wondering what they are eating, since no one has caught any fish, just coconuts? I think the cameramen must be secretly sneeking food to them. Our chicken Gloria doesn't want to leave camp and decides to make a nest, why leave paradise now, she knows whose feeding her!

When the final survivors make the journey of remembering, I always start to feel sentimental, ok, maybe for 10 seconds. I forgot who originally played in the game, it seemed so long ago, so it's a good refresher. Bye Fairplay, bye Yauman, gee were they even in this game?

The final challenge was one of concentration and determination, holding blocks together without dropping the ball on top. Of course, Parvati is the first one to drop her ball, has she ever won any challenges? That challenge looked hard with the sun beating down and Amanda and Cirie licking the sweat off their lips. I was sweating just looking at them and Amanda wins the final challenge. I kinda wanted Cirie to win to mix things up, but I was ok with any of them winning. Get the Kleenex out because Amanda starts to whine on how she has to make the decision to cast off one of them and you know whose going home, Cirie. I don't know why she wanted to keep Parv. They are like two slices of white toast and at least if she would have kept Cirie, there would have been a big difference between them, stragety and game playing. I think Amanda would have had a better chance with Cirie sitting next to her than Parv. But in the end, did it matter who was up against Amanda? Amanda just doesn't have any verbal skills. Being on equal footing between Parvati and Amanda, I think it came down to how they came across to the jury during the final Inquisition. The only thing Parv had going for her was her strategic underhanded game play, which it seems, that the meaner, the more devious, the more you have back stabbed people and lied, the more you increase your chances of winning, with the exception of Ethan, from Survivor Africa. Amanda didn't have a chance against anyone, because she couldn't verbalize her playing ability. I thought she should have said that she managed to be in the final two twice, which I think is a total testament to the way she played the game and is proof that she has what it takes to be the ultimate survivor. But because she was unable to persuade the jury, she lost the vote of confidence. All they saw was a weak, sniffling Amanda, what they needed to see was a strong, competent Amazonian woman, but instead they got give me a hankie please!

In the end, Amanda might not have won the game, but she managed to win the guy, Oz. Isn't love grand. I loved Ozzy's speech and his denouncing Parv's game play for the sake of a million dollars, but Oz, it's a million dollars, let's face it, I'd sell my husband for a million dollars! Ok, not really sell him, well maybe for George Clooney. I thought he was going to produce a ring for Amanda's finger, I'm forever a romantic!

Hey have you been tuning into the webcast of Ponderosa? I love the peek at life after Survivor. It's hysterical and makes the Survivors back into real people and not the contestants you love to hate. Ponderosa is like a glorified camp with all the food, drink and Crest white strips you could want. Hey I could live like that forever and with the gorgeous beach at their footsteps. Well, this season was totally satisfying, like eating a good surf and turf dinner, can't wait for Survivor Gabon, Africa, looks promising! See you on the blog!-Single D

Here we are, the final four - 3 faves and one fan. The girls are celebrating but now the interesting part starts. I'm sure Natalie will be the next one out if she doesn't win immunity. We'll see who steps next into the Venus fly trap.

Immunity challenge is a ladder puzzle but to get the key to unlock the pieces, the girls have to stand on twenty foot pole and use buckets of water to raise the key. Cirie wasted too much time trying to reach the key and fell behind quickly. Is it just me or were there holes in the bottom of those buckets? It seemed to me that there was a lot of water leaking out when they were raised. Anyway, Natalie and Parvati take an early lead dashing my hopes for Amanda. Oh ye of little faith I tell myself, for our Amazon Amanda comes back and blows them out of the water! She really is a good match for our Jungle Boy Ozzy!

As Jeff talks about the blindsides at tribal later that day, the camera pans to the jury and we get a shot of Ozzy glaring at the girls. I guess he's still upset about his blindside. It's your own fault Ozzy, how many times do people say don't get too comfortable. No one is safe in Survivor! Cirie starts saying that she feels she is on the bottom as she plays the poor pitiful me card. Well she can stop saying that as the vote comes back and Natalie becomes a jury member.

As they return to camp, Cirie is still doing the poor me thing and starts yelling at Amanda which makes Amanda start yelling back, kind of. I think Amanda was just defending herself and trying to make Cirie see that she has not been on the bottom. After all, if Cirie was on the bottom all this time, I don't think she would have made it this far. Amanda starts crying, her and Cirie make up and they all have a group hug and all is right with the world. The next morning they decide to free the last chicken which they have named Gloria. Gloria doesn't seem to want to leave as she makes a nest right in front of the girls. That chicken has ceased to be a chicken and is now a pet!

Next comes the reflection walk. Who is Mary? I had already forgotten some of the players, not Yau-man though! He got such a raw deal! There is something about this part that brings out my emotional side. It's almost like watching a memorial for a funeral, I have to remind myself that these people are alive just not in the game!

The last immunity challenge, balance a metal ball on a cylinder while adding pieces to the handle every 5 minutes. I'm still cheering for Amanda. As they add the pieces, Jeff stirs the pot telling the girls they are battling each other. Parvati drops out first and as I'm sitting on the edge of my sofa, Cirie loses concentration in the final seconds giving Amanda immunity and me a quick calorie burn as I jump up and down cheering. Jeff explains to Amanda that by casting her vote at tribal, she is saying who she will take with her to the end (really?!). With that, Jeff tells the girls to have a fun afternoon. Nice Jeff, drop a load like that then say "have fun". Nothing like some mind games to polish off an afternoon.

Back at camp, Parvati is talking to Amanda like it's already them in the final two. Parvati tells Amanda that Cirie has pissed off more people than she has making Amanda's decision that much harder. At tribal, Amanda starts crying again about the decision she has to make but she votes out Cirie, crying the whole time while Parvati breaks out in a huge grin.

Cirie's little speech at the end didn't make me feel sorry for her. Cirie pretty much rode everyone's coat tails. I will say that she did do some fast talking to save her butt and was instrumental in some of the blind sides, but other than that, she didn't do anything around the camp and remember when she was going around saying that she was in control and everyone should be bowing to her and doing her laundry? That's right, and she says she was on the bottom, HA! Ultimately she was on the bottom, but HA!

Now it's the jury's turn. Eliza comes out with guns blazing but we all expected that didn't we? Natalie's questions to Parvati about how her flirting translates into the bedroom gets everyone so confused that Jeff asks Parvati if she knew what was being asked of her. I think Natalie was just feeling out Parvarti for a date. Cirie is still pissed off at Amanda for voting her out and she still thinks she should have been in the final two. I'm sorry, but Cirie is sitting there dripping in diamonds and she should get a million bucks?! Maybe she needs it to pay off her jeweler.

Ozzy is still mad about being blindsided telling Parvati she threw away their friendship for a million dollars. Ozzy pours his heart out to Amanda telling her his is falling for her. Isn't reality TV love grand?

What is wrong with Amanda?! During the jury questioning, she just sat there like she expected them to hand her a million dollars. Now is the time to toot that horn girl! But does she?! No! And Parvati is talking herself up saying how well she played the game. I was yelling at the TV for Amanda to stand up for herself! She was final two twice, she won a lot of challenges, she worked around camp, she stayed loyal to her alliances. I don't know, maybe when you get to the end you are so worn out physically and emotionally you just want it to be over.

So Parvati wins the million. At least Amanda still has Ozzy. Maybe they will make little jungle king babies and we will see them on Survivor 36! Double D

Top Chef - Wedding Wars

For the quickfire challenge this week, the chefs are divided into two teams to do the relay race. The race is to make a quart of mayo, section an orange, peel an artichoke and fillet a monk fish. Let me tell you, a monk fish is one Ugly fish! Andrew tore through those artichokes like a hot knife through butter. Richard & Dale go head to head to fillet the monk fish. The teams are even so it comes down to the mayo making with Lisa and Nikki. Lisa is a whiz at it making that whisk fly! My arm hurt just watching her. Lisa's mayo making talent won her team the quickfire challenge. Dale, who is on Nikki's team, freaks out and slams his hand into a locker leaving a good size dent. Lighten up Dale, you can't win them all! Instead of restaurant wars as in Top Chef's past, they are doing wedding wars complete with wedding cake. One team will cater to the groom's tastes and, of course, the other team will cater to the bride. Dale's team get the groom who likes Italian food so Nikki should have a chance to redeem herself. Richard's team get the bride who seems to want a mix of bar food and picnic fare. Andrew is so excited about wedding wars that he says he has a culinary boner. Now there is someone who likes cooking! Dale, on the other hand is already getting an attitude saying he is picking up everyones slack and doing everything. The rest of the team is not happy with Dale since he is not willing to be a team player and won't work with anyone. I guess if he isn't cooking with Richard, he won't cook with anyone. After a day and half of straight cooking, the chefs start feeling the lack of sleep as Andrew stops talking much to the surprise of everyone and Dale, when asked by Chef Tom, can't remember what it was he prepared. Dale had his hand in so much that I can understand that. Nikki would not step up and take control of the team even though she has the most experience with Italian food. Lisa started on the groom's cake right away just in case something went wrong. She made a chocolate hazelnut three tiered cake. A cake Single D would love! It wasn't pretty but I'm sure it tasted good. Stephanie stepped up to make the bride's cake, a five tiered dark chocolate cake with lemon filling. Her cake was OK looking, she decorated it with fresh flowers. The menus started with short ribs and blue cheese in phyllo, pizza, pulled pork sandwiches and bruschetta on flat bread. Chef Tom was practically gnawing on the flat bread and Gail was afraid she would break a tooth. The bride's dinner consisted of fillet, potatoes gratin, creamed spinach (one of my faves) and crispy, almond crusted chicken. The groom's dinner was mixed roasted veggies, butternut squash tortellini, sea bass, pork and beef ragu as well as fillet. Richard's team bride, was the judges favorite with Richard winning, again. Richard gave his prize, a $2000 gift certificate to Crate and Barrel (one of my favorite stores), to Stephanie saying that she was a trouper for making the wedding cake. Stephanie told Richard they could split the prize. OK, enough of the nicey nice! Dale's team groom failed terribly and Dale says he did everything but won't take responsibility for anything saying everyone but him did bad. This upsets Spike who goes off on Dale calling him a little b!tch. Them's fightin' words dude! Spike is a little full of himself when the judges tell him his sea bass was the only good dish from the team but his roasted veggies were terrible. Nikki was the first to say she was not the lead on this challenge and the judges asked her why not since she is the Italian food expert of the team. Nikki is told to pack her knives and go. The judges thought she did not step up and take the lead. Come on girl, you are an Italian chef and groom wanted an Italian menu. She SO should have been the lead. Back to the pasta kitchen with you! Double D

Survivor-Fans vs Favorites-Erik Errors!

This will absolutely go down in the annuals of Survivor history as one of the funniest, craziest blindsides ever! OMG! Wasn't this the best episode ever! To begin from the beginning, Erik's pissed at Amanda for outing him during tribal council. Amanda gets the notion to work on Erik and sweet talk him into her side. The reward challenge is looming ahead and thoughts are turning to who will get the privilege of going to Exile Island for one last chance at finding another immunity idol. Amanda makes him a promise that if she wins reward that she will take him and for him if he wins to take her and send Parv to Exile to which he innocently agrees. I am saying here, is he crazy or what? The reward challenge is Survivor history questions, to which Erik is pretty knowledgeable at, gee imagine that, since as Jeff Probst pointed out that at the first Survivor, Erik was only 14! Erik wins reward and keeps his promise to Amanda, takes her to reward and sends Parv to Exile. Natalie you can close your mouth now. Plan 1 complete. The spa reward looked absolutely amazing. Of course any reward involving a massage and a pedicure is heaven! Back at camp Cirie is taking great glee at Natalie's distress at Erik backstabbing her. The Black Widow's web is falling apart. A camera shot of Exile island shows Parv sunbathing on the beach like it was some sort of resort. She has no inclination of finding that immunity idol, who cares, she has the numbers. Once back at camp, Erik is flapping around like a fish out of water, switching sides by the minute. Guess that happens to men when they are out numbered by women. Erik has little clue on the workings of women. Doesn't he know that women if forced to commune will probably stick together unless of course he's the desirable male to which he doesn't come close. Sorry Erik. Erik knows it's do or die to win immunity challenge for him. The immunity challenge was a difficult series of digging and putting puzzles together. Of course Erik wins, his digging ability is far superior to the ladies. The girls are dismayed that he won again!

Back at camp, the four girls are hatching an absurd plan. Cirie tells Natalie, that if she could work her magic on Erik to give her the immunity necklace as a gesture of goodwill, they wil pretend to vote off Amanda. Natalie says that is crazy, no one would do that! But Natalie gives it her girlish try and gets the wheels spinning in Erik's little brain. Erik's comment it's not all hair on my head, yes it is Erik, it's just hair up there, no brains.

At tribal council, Jeff Probst knows just the perfect questions to ask to stir up the drama and Erik's insecurity. Cirie should become a shrink once she leaves Survivor, because she sure knows how to push peoples buttons and tells Erik that for him to redeem himself a gesture of goodwill needs to be shown. These are the magic words that Erik needs to hear and he gives, yes you heard me right, gives the immunity necklace to Natalie, much to the chagrin of the jury and the women! What a moment! I was laughing my skinny, bony ass off. This guy is probably a virgin. He doesn't know women, is too trusting and has no common sense! Erik you just gave away a million dollars! I bet he still lives at home with his mama. Erik don't you remember that the first rule of Survivor is to remember that it's a game? I guess you can say it's refreshing that someone would be so trusting in others and believe in the goodwill and sincerity of others. Yeah in a perfect world! In the perfect world, my husband is George Clooney and I look like Angelina Jolie. Sorry Erik, it's a hard knock life. Don't get too jaded, we women are not all bad. I loved his parting sentence "You guys drive me crazy" and with that another perfect blindside! -Single D

Amanda didn't win any points with Erik after going off on him which gets Erik thinking, send thee to the jury. Amanda has other plans and starts playing Erik by making up and striking a deal with him to take her on the reward challenge should he win. Natalie is also playing on her friendship with Erik. So where is Cirie and Parvati in this little love fest? It looks like Erik starts to get a little suspicious when he says he can't trust anyone. Keep thinking that Erik after all, you are the Super Fan and have seen what goes on in this game.

The reward challenge is to answer questions of Survivor past. This is right up our Super Fan Erik's alley. It was fun to relive Survivor past. I remembered a lot of the situations but not the seasons so I would have lost bad. Our resident cutie, Jeff had to point out that Erik was 14 when he started watching Survivor. Thanks for making me feel old Jeff! Erik wins reward with his vast knowledge of Survivor and will forever retain his Super Fan status.

Erik keeps his word (of course) to Amanda and takes her on reward which is a helicopter ride to a resort where massages and food await. With all that pampering and food, not to mention Amanda sitting across from him dressed only in what looked like a towel, Erik looked like a love (or lust) struck puppy and that he wanted a little more from her than just friends. Go ahead Amanda, make him a man!

Back at camp, Natalie is confused and not real happy that her friend took another woman to reward. Cirie plays on that making Natalie believe that Erik may not be so loyal after all. After Erik and Amanda return, Natalie comes upon Erik & Cirie talking about the final three and she is not part of it.

Immunity challenge - a repeat of find the coordinates, dig for the puzzle pieces and put it together. Erik is pretty darn sure he needs to win this to stay in the game so he goes full tilt on the digging while Parvati barely makes a dent in the sand and Cirie not too worried either. His only competition seems to be Amazon Amanda but Erik stays ahead and wins immunity which means he has a spot in the final four.

Rather than except defeat, the girls, with Cirie spearheading this, convince Natalie to get Erik to give her the immunity idol so they can vote him out. With all the girls playing him, Erik looks like he may be on ropes and possibly considering giving up the idol.

At tribal, the girls are still working Erik making him think that he has to do something to redeem himself. What exactly has he done to have to redeem himself you may ask? I'm wondering that too but those girls are SO good that Erik is sure he has done something. OK so he's young, I'll give him that, otherwise he's stupid if he gives up immunity. He's been watching this show for how long?

How do you say STUPID? Let me count the ways! Erik does give Natalie immunity and the whole jury can't believe it. I thought James was going to fall off his seat he was laughing so hard. Parvati declares Erik the dumbest survivor ever. I have to agree with her as a stunned Erik gets his torch snuffed and James says at least he lost the title of dumbest survivor. Never underestimate determined women! Double D

Tila Tequila-Shot at Love-# 2

This week's episode is a challenge of endurance, no not by the contestants, but by me. Can I endure a whole hour of sloppy lame relay races and endurance swallowing? The Bi Athleon featuring a relay race, men against men haters, slipping into wet suits, jumping into pools to retrieve pearl necklaces, dunking for red or blue balls that have men or women symbols and then slip sliding into home base. The only obstacle to this course was it's participants. The guys take a big lead in the beginning but lose it when one of them gets caught up in not being able to find the right ball. It's a slip slide photo finish, but the girls win by a fin. I couldn't understand why the girls were not able to slip on the slide, it looked like they were dead fish flopping on land. The winners, girls, gets a class with Tila, the loser boys, get to go to the prom. Humm, I think going to the prom is much more fun that sitting in class. Tila plays the sexy instructor in a class of girls gone bad in their catholic girl's uniforms. The challenge, whoever writes I love Tila 25 times the quickest gets some one on one time with the teacher. Lisa, the softball instructor wins of course, she does have a strong arm. The funniest thing was when Tila brought out the robospanker, where in the world do they sell that? While the girls are in class, the guys get in trouble by staging a panty raid in the girls suitcases. They had them on their heads, using them as slingshots, stringing them up. The girls were enraged. Ok, that's where I draw the line, you just don't mess around with a women's suitcase, that's just plain wrong! Glitter starts to cry saying that everyone is so mean. Glitter, you need to go home, MTV is not for the faint of heart. At the prom, everyone is vying for Tila's time. Ryan gets some alone time and Tila says that he's kinda cute, except he kisses like a dead frog. Cut to Glitter crying.

The next challenge is the "Conveyor Belch" nice! The participants have to drink shots of mysterious liquids. Glitter is still crying. Not so mysterious and not so nasty. Stuff like hot sauce, lime juice, mustard, canola oil, etc...well, at least it's food stuff. You would think that the shots were animal urine or something the way everyone was puking. And not in puke buckets, but on the carpet. Didn't their mothers teach them anything? I pronounce the whole lot weak as water, they better not try out for survivor, they couldn't eat worms or bat stew. Weak! The girls win again, 68 shots to 64. The girls then have to compete for a date with Tila by eating a pigs va -jay jay. Now that's gross. Some where out there, there are some poor piggies without their va-jay jays, is that nice? Lisa's determination and the ability to sallow pig wins her the date but not before she had to chose one guy to accompany them. She choses mild manner Dominic. During their threesome date, Dominic makes the mistake of telling Tila that he thinks all this bi stuff is just a phases, whoopsie, wrong comment. Tila takes offense to that which is unfortunate for Dominic since it seems like he's not your regular animal house resident. The elimination round is a chopping of 4 off the show, V, Lauren, Ryan (the frog kisser) and Dominic. Thank goodness the faster we can get rid of the participants the faster the show will be over, but then again I'm sure MTV is already planning Tila 3!-Single D

American Idol-Final Four

Where has the season gone that we are now down to the final four, David Cook, David Archuleta, Syesha and Jason. This week it's music from the Rock and Roll hall of fame. David Cook starts the show off with "Hungry Like the Wolf"-is that a classic? It was just ok. It seems to me that all his songs sound the same. He really needs to tame the hair and have a make over. Will someone find him a comb? I thought Syesha's Proud Mary, would make Tina Turner proud, although Simon thought it was a cheap karaoke. I thought the second song was ok, although I didn't recognize that Sam Cook song. I know she's proud of her heritage, but does she have to get all weepy eye over it? Maybe it was the pressure of this whole thing. Syesha does have an amazing range to her voice and yes, all her songs sound different. I think that finally the judges are beginning to see that Jason really doesn't have the right stuff. Jason chose a Bob Marley song. Why, duh, because of the hair dude! I thought "I Shot the Sheriff" was terrible. Can you really display amazing vocals on that song? When even Paula is hesitant to like it, then you know it's really bad. I thought his second choice, "Hey, Mr. Tambourine Man" was a perfect choice. His voice reminds me of Cat Stevens, sing some Cat for us!

The show stealer of the evening was David Archuleta singing one of my favorites, "Stand By Me". I could melt! Now that's a classic. When he said that he was going to sing the Elvis, "Love Me Tender", I thought why? But his rendition of it was pure magic. I can't imagine what his voice would be like if he had both vocal chords, truly amazing! Shame on you stage Dad! He's lucky that he didn't ruin David's voice and my choice to win this whole thing! -Single D